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Starting Over

I hate to admit it, but after six years of running and watching my food like a nervous teen awaits a prom date, I am starting over. The broken leg has became the most disruptive event in my journey to fitness. I haven't gained back all my weight - not even close.

I have gained back 19 pounds. 11 of that since my fracture 8 weeks ago.

Worse is that I have lost my fitness. My resting heart rate was 48; today it was 72. That means all the efficiencies my body made to keep me running are quite a ways away. I honestly don't know what it will take to get back to my peak performance.

I now have until April 22nd to get it pulled together for the London Marathon.

I was sad on Sunday when the reminder for my 14-miler came up on the calendar. I had a nice simple Christmas. A few gifts with family and some special (but not huge) meals together. I saw my youngest Saturday, and Sunday I drove to see my middle daughter for Christmas day.

I love being with family - but my eldest lives 3000 miles away so we just chatted on the phone.

Today I have to get going. I have been cleared to run a little and get on the bike. So I am setting up the bike today, joining the gym, and going to try a little run. It's 26F out there today. The's below 0C.

I guess I am little scared to get running again.

Is it going to hurt? Will I re-injure myself? In my head, all this fracture business is behind me. In my body, there are certainly some strong signs that I need to take it easy. I don't really want to take it easy. I want to go on a fitness binge. Hearing "You got this."  won't make my body heal. :( I am also hoping that running a little will shake off the depression and lethargy. I feel like I did when I had congestive heart failure - I'm just lazy, bloated, and feel tired.

BUT - today is the day. Join the gym, get the bike on the trainer, and suit up for a cold run.

Wish me luck.

Oh, and Happy New Year.

I Think I Need a New Tattoo - Not Dying Reward

Today I am off to the hospital for a bone scan. Later this week I will get the results. There is a lot more health stuff to do before the year ends. I have to go back for an ultrasound of my heart. It’s my six year follow up to congestive heart failure.

I will also be back at the orthopedic surgeon to check the progress of my broken femur.

I came to MFP to be fit, and all it seems that I have done if chase one medical problem after the other. 2 years after having congestive heart failure, I was feeling very healthy.  I was eating the right things, running and in general, felt better than ever.

In 2013 I had my first cancer diagnosis.

Except for that, I was very healthy until 2015. I ran 4 marathons in one 1 year – 3 in 3 months - plus I ran all the way across Rhode Island. I had personal best time in every distance. In 2016 my running trailed off due to some other health stuff.

Except for my blood pressure meds which I have been on for a very long time, that was all I took.

I take most things in stride, but it bothers me that I work so hard at this and I still can’t avoid the doctor’s office other than a yearly physical.  The cancer follow-ups every 3 or 6 months can wear me out.

One cancer survivor called it PCSD. Post Cancer Stress Syndrome.

In 2016 when I was feeling low about running and my health, I got a tattoo to commemorate my running 3 of the 6 Word Major marathons. Despite braking my femur 7 weeks ago, I am running London and I will finish.

Then I need to find a way to get into Tokyo for 2019.

Without a goal, this whole thing becomes very depressing. Some days people telling me “be strong,” and “you got this,” isn’t enough. I need to rely on my faith and those close to me who let me vent.

I am holding my own with the food. 

I haven’t done more than 1000 steps in a day for over a month! I haven’t run a single mile. I did, however, get to level 124 in Bubble Witch Saga 3. I also have lots to be grateful for. It bothers me that I have to strip down for strangers. Again!

I Don't Want to be Obese Again! But...

It has been more than 5 years since I started this journey, but not yet 10. I lost the first 5 pounds and then the first 10 pounds. I ran a 5K and then a 10K. 

Finally I lost over 70 pounds. I also ran 8 marathons.

This is my first blog back since the wedding. Me and Ruth couldn't be happier! It is amazing what connecting with the right person can do. She supports my career goals, my diet and comes to every half or full marathon to cheer me on. The rest she runs with me.

I have written about my broken femur. Well, it's healed!

6 weeks ago I ran a half marathon and stepped in a pothole about an inch deep. It was just enough to force me to put too much weight on my left leg. That was somewhere between miles 9 and 10. I finished the race and could not wait to sit down!

I did the guy thing and waited a week before seeing a doctor.

I thought it was a flesh wound, but the doctor found a crack in the femur at the knee. Originally they though it even looked healed - an old football injury. Or in my case, motocross or hockey. 2 weeks out I went to the orthopedic surgeon. They did an MRI and found a rather large subcutaneous fracture.

Did I tell you I also had a fracture in my foot not long ago?

All this got me to thinking about why I had 2 fractures, yet I easily finished a full marathon in September. I messaged the doctor and he is going to have me in for a bone scan. It could be related to my medication, or something more sinister. I don't know.

Yeah. :(

I decided to do something more than just see doctors. I am a believer in the power of prayer (and working hard to achieve results). This past Saturday while Ruth was out shopping with her son, I went to the healing rooms and got prayer. In just a few minutes I went from walking on crutches to getting around pretty well. The bone pain was gone, Really gone!

My leg is still stiff and weak from non use, but that is manageable.

All this not running, laying bed, resting, and taking it easy make my food consumption a huge risk. I want to be back in onederland. Currently I am at 217. It sucks because I was doing so well. I always look forward to stepping on the scale when I go for my yearly cardiology check up, which is next week.

The doctor continues to smile at my progress and sticktoitiveness.

This weight loss thing is so fragile. I am doing what I know how to do and will be more and more active in the coming weeks. Portions are the key as my diet is still really good, I cut down on the fruit and upped the protein a little more. Less sugar and less carbs (which turn to sugar and stored fat).

I don't think I could manage my weight without activity. I do no't want to be obese again!

I am in for my 4th quarter checkups with half a dozen doctors. I have to get my blood drawn for PSAs next week. I expect those to be better too!

Thanks for the votes and comments, but most important, thanks for your support.
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