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Why Can't We Just Accept It, That...

You've met them. Some of them are your MFP friends, and others are in real life. They are people who can't see that they are in trouble with their weight and ultimately their health. And worst of all, you could be one of those that continue to give yourself permission to avoid the reality.

You know that you are in denial when:

- The doc says you need to lose weight, and you think, I don't look that bad.

- Your insurance company gives you $600 a year in savings for doing their health rewards program and you think about all the food you could buy with it.

- You buy a selfie stick to get the best aerial shot for your Facebook profile pic.

- You say that if God had wanted you to exercise and touch your toes, He would have put them higher up on your body.

- Your favorite pants don't fit, and you blame your spouse for washing them in hot water and then drying then on high.

- You go to the coffee shop and tell the cashier the coffee is for you, and the donuts are for your pet Fighting Fish, when the truth is it's the other way around.

- You go to an "all you can eat" restaurant or buffet because you have invested in their stock.

- You eat whatever you like because you get a lot of exercise - pushing the buttons on the remote.

- You heard that there were two pieces of cake in the fridge, and think how sad it is that you missed one.

- Instead of looking at the size tag on clothes, you look to see if it has elastic.

- You kick the scale, well, because it's a scale damit.

- All your vacation photos at Disney were taken at the Food Court in Epcot Center.

- You get flowers and chocolates from an admirer and throw the flowers out.

- You eat because, well, your mouth wasn't that busy at the time.

- You are out of breath just thinking about exercise.

- You go to weddings because the cake is free.

- You tell yourself this is the last pizza... today...

- You try to do a push up and discover that a number of body parts have not left the floor.

Thanks for the votes and comments.

Friend me at your own risk.

87 votes + -


drdwngfan wrote 76 months ago:
You think that 4xl shirts actually look good on you.
PlantBasedRnr wrote 76 months ago:
Yeah... I know some of this is " tongue in cheek " but some of it hits a little to close to home.
dsjohndrow wrote 76 months ago:
Just trying to find a nice way to break down the excuses, partner. I can add, it ain't easy, and some days it is downright difficult!
jmnicholas wrote 76 months ago:
You do know that I only go running so that I can eat more cake, right?!!
I love this excuse though - and the cake which (sometimes) follows!
dsjohndrow wrote 76 months ago:
JMN - yup, cake!
UncleMac wrote 76 months ago:
I thought Denial was a river?
dsjohndrow wrote 76 months ago:
It is.
marlown wrote 76 months ago:
You are truly an inspiration and a great writer, as well. All kidding aside, I know several people who are literally killing themselves because of being overweight. And unless something changes, they won't be living a long life. My sister-in-law, sister, daughter and then others in my family who are smoking and drinking themselves into early graves. Just lost my 50 year old brother to lung and kidney cancer and he left a 12 year old son without a responsible guardian. So sad. Why is it so difficult? But it is. I have fought the battles and won most of them (except for that last 20 lb yo-yo) but it's still a struggle not to go backwards. We fight for other things in life, but somehow the battle for health and fitness seems too much for many of us to stick with. But you can be a positive influence - to children in your life, young adults, even older folks. Every person we can encourage, inspire, push, pull, teach, whatever it takes, to lose weight and take charge of their health, are lives that we may be saving. Keep up the good work!
dsjohndrow wrote 76 months ago:
Yeah, this is hard work. Some days I don't want to do it.
curleytop60 wrote 76 months ago:
You are sooooo right. I have done that for years, along with on again off again diets. This time I am starting over and I am going to keep with it. I have to, I have to much to loose. I love your blog it really puts things into perspective, at least for me.
But you forgot 1, you look in the mirror and say I don't look that bad.
Con't on your journey.
Anniepi66 wrote 76 months ago:
Truth hurts! Sigh. Thanks for sharing these thoughts.
meganjcallaghan wrote 76 months ago:
my favourite 8 inch round cookies n' cream cake from a local grocery store is ONLY 1600 calories for the whole thing!!! I totally run to eat cake....but when I'm hitting 16-20km a day in the winter and 20- 30 in the summer...I figure I earned that it's entirety. lol
duchessglencairn wrote 76 months ago:
I'm trying to figure out what to say here as I read the top that indicated it is with a "sense of humor". Food is a coping mechanism for so many people and couching this "humor" under a concern about health is nothing short of fat shaming those who might be struggling with a very real mental illness.

Good for you and the journey that you were/are on, but these statements are not going to make someone struggling with their weight sit up and say, "Yep, I need to change my coping mechanism". I understand your health was affected by your weight, but everyone is on their own journey. Shame, in any form, doesn't help or move the conversation along.

I assume that nothing good will come from this but there are thousands of people who are struggling with this everyday (and I am one) who might come across this blog and fall into a shame spiral because they have felt this was a safe place. I hope you keep those people in mind the next time your judgmental humor crosses into shame.

Also, denial is not a river in Egypt. It never has been a river in Egypt.
Anonymous wrote 76 months ago:
Using shaming techniques to get people to conform to your ideals of "health" dont help.

You'll never understand the struggles other people go through due to trauma, or why they shift to coping with food or drugs or alcohol to deal.

Maybe first ask why, then ask "how can I help in your journey."
randomtai wrote 76 months ago:
This is great. People still make excuses around here I see. Smh
wannabpiper wrote 76 months ago:
Love it! I see myself highlighted in your list a few times and laughed myself stupid. Don't stop the wonderful blog posts because of a few overly-serious, grumpy comments, DJ.
dsjohndrow wrote 76 months ago:
There is no shame in being, fat, obese, overweight etc. There shame should be in the denial of the grave health issues that it causes. If you are looking of coddling so you can stay where you are, you won't get it from me. I worked hard to beat obesity, heart disease and cancer. I lost almost 100 pounds. I did it by embracing my weakness, faith and a lot of hard work; which it appears, some are not willing to do. Good luck on your journeys to the 2 posters above. Maybe this is not your time. To every one else, nice work! It's hard, but rewarding.
MichelleB69 wrote 76 months ago:
I always used to wonder what "flipped the switch" for some people, after watching them make major life changes. Then, it happened to me...real, permanent change occurs when you are so miserable where you are at that any alternative seems plausible. Most of us are so used to feeling bad as a baseline that we have forgotten what it's like to truly feel good, both mentally and physically. And unfortunately, some people never get to that point in their journey to experience it. And it's not a success only journey, but it's definitely worth it. There is no greater compliment than to have someone tell you, "you are an inspiration to me"
rperkins524 wrote 76 months ago:
I needed this. The pizza thing in particular.... Eating in moderation, yay, great... but not something I myself can do. I was going to get dominos with coworkers for lunch, even though I have perfectly good lunch.... I'm not going to. I changed my mind.
Wysewoman53 wrote 76 months ago:
Some of these are quite funny. However, I have a very close friend who would fit into many of these categories. She has diabetes II and just recently started using insulin because the pills she was on aren't working very well for her anymore. I try gently nudging her towards a better lifestyle but she doesn't really hear me very well. As long as her blood pressure and her sugar counts are low, due to medication, she thinks she is doing fine. I have tried to get her to sign in to MFP but so far, no luck. She also has congestive heart problems and has already had two heart attacks. Any ideas about getting her to see she is slowly killing herself without being so blunt I may lose her even sooner as a friend?
JulieGirl58 wrote 76 months ago:
How do I like my eggs? In a cake.
Mardill wrote 76 months ago:
I did not feel that your post was "shaming". It truly reflects what a lot of people think when denying their food problems.
Pizza is what my husband wants for dinner tonight & it has been ordered, but reading your post has reminded me of what I truly want. So, I will pick up the pizza but will not eat the pastry just the toppings of my side of the pizza (Vegetarian) & will have only 1 slice.
Thank you! you have saved me from myself again!

I think we all need humour to help us carry on our journey to a healthy lifestyle.
Carol_ wrote 76 months ago:
I love this!
retirehappy wrote 76 months ago:
So very funny, and full of truth.

I see no shaming here, just some truth, in a way that makes me laugh. You're a good writer, keep it up. And my your good health continue for many years to come.
TerriRubioBailey wrote 76 months ago:
And the list can go on to infinity, blah blah blah,
Accept, hmmm. A big word, covers so much.
We are all at different levels of the A word.
Like other addictions, it has to be faced with complete truth.
I see people fail when they can't embrace that simple principle,
Truth of what you've become, and Do I really want to change it?
A bit of humor in every truth, so I can laugh at the list.
However until I devoted myself accept my condition. I was doomed.
I have great phone buddies to call when i get weak, or need to commiseerate. And I don't put myself in harms way.
Go MFP's, these chat board are great.

RaeBeeBaby wrote 76 months ago:
I thoroughly enjoyed this amusing blog and didn't find one thing "shaming" about it. The writer is poking a bit of fun at himself. If you see yourself in his amusing anecdotes, then the shame you feel is your own and not put on you by anyone else. I have struggled with my weight, smoking, drinking and other life coping strategies. Often looking outside myself for answers, self-worth and solutions. We are all masters of our own ship and only we can decide to change course. It has taken me half a century to realize I cannot control anyone else's behavior. Only my own. It's called internal "locus of control" and it is my new philosophy for the second half century.
DEBOO7 wrote 76 months ago:
The reality is that people only change because they want to change... it has to come from within - it's about personal accountability. I think many of us have been there trying to encourage friends, partners, family to change their lifestyle. It doesn't work... in fact it seems to just annoy them!
pkw58 wrote 76 months ago:
Great post. I adopted my healthy lifestyle in Dec 2014 at age 54, and I absolutely without hesitation can tell you that once I owned my responsibility for my health, the best thing that happened was learning to laugh at myself. I found no shame in this post, and I can tell you that once I down to "healthy weight range" it was just the beginning. Posts like this remind me to laugh at myself, own my health choices, and keep going. Thanks for posting.
pizzafruit wrote 76 months ago:
Humor is a great tool. We laugh and we look for things we identify with. These posts are great for people like me who use self humor to cover up what's really going on. Letting go of the pain and learning self acceptance is a huge step for anyone attempting change. I appreciate your thought provoking posts.
MimiOfTheFraserValley wrote 76 months ago:
This was funny & I chuckled the whole way through, but I definitely recognise the truth in it, having told myself a few of these at various times in my life. Thank-you for it!! :)
phillipl12 wrote 76 months ago:
I see so much of me in what you's so uncanny because it's like we've met and you know my life's story. You're right about "denial", it is within most of us and that's why we never commit to change lifestyles in order to better our health. Keep sharing your thoughts about the's very inspiring!
leahandbella wrote 76 months ago:
It's funny people. Like all satirical writing someone will be offended. I thought it was spot on, I could see myself in most of the points. Sometimes it IS funny to poke fun at ourselves and since not everyone is the same then skip the post if you don't like it!
marekdds wrote 76 months ago:
Very funny! I saw no shaming in this. As you say, there is no shame in being overweight. Extra poundage doesn't make you a bad person. You need to value yourself to make changes. No one can do it for you. If you can't laugh at yourself, especially over the silly excuses you make, that is a shame.
GrandmaPeridow wrote 76 months ago:
I have a hard time with some kinds of humor. That is my problem not yours. I saw myself in one or two of the comments. I know I need to lose weight. Twenty pounds to start with. I looked and felt much better when I was 20 pounds less. It came back on after moving to a different town. I know how it happened. I know what to do to get the weight back off. Now I just need to do it.
Good luck on your journeys. I will continue on mine.
alphaedge wrote 76 months ago:
I think I like you, David! You have a sense of humor about the whole health thing and that's a good thing.
I run a fitness blog and have found that education and motivation don't get people to listen. Humor does. Keep it up.
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