I don't know about you, but some of the folks in my life are pretty aware of who I am, and what I like. They know my long time interests include: ice hockey, music, shooting, photography and Christianity. They find it easy to get me something at Guitar Center or Best Buy. They might even get me a pair of tickets to see the Bruins, but then they are afraid that I will ask them to come to the game. Needless to say, I haven't received Bruins tickets since 1975. I am not much for gift cards unless it is iTunes or a restaurant. However; I don't think the ex-fat man is going to get any gift certificates to Mickey D's this year.

The problem is when there is an apparent new interest. IE: Wight loss. I decided to make a list of what I don't want for gifts. Here is David's Top 10 Gifts that Would Suck List:

- Vintage Vibrating Weight Loss Machine: I can't imagine just standing there having my flab massaged at 120 beats per minute. With my luck it would just push it to some other unsightly location. (see photo)

- Yoga Mat: Mostly because they come in pink. Anything that has to be done on the floor that's good for you, should involve alcohol and/or a heart rate over 130. Besides, it's going to pick up all the dog hair and germs on the floor. Blech!

- Insta Slim Shirts: I am not really into clothing that crushes my diaphragm and causes my love handles to move up to my armpits. Worse is the one that pushes my back-lap up so that it looks like I have kidney stones the size of softballs. Shapewear is not not going to hide 20 or 30 pounds as well as Photoshop.

- Home Pole Dancing Kit: I am just not a dancer. And anything the elevates me above the floor more than a few inches increases the risk of bodily damage 10 fold. (Check Amazon!)

- BodyGlide Anti-Chafe Gel: I suppose it might be a stocking stuffer which is hidden under the nuts and apples.  How would someone know if I was having this problem anyway?

- Guy Girdles: It's the name. I am trying keep my man card.

- Weight Watchers Membership: That is on par with me saying to my girlfriend, "Yes!" when she asks if she looks fat in a dress. Although I believe that anyone dumb enough to ask that question, is smart enough to know that answer. Besides, MFP is better, cheaper and cooler. Just sayin'.

- Oscar the Grouch Talking Scale: "What's wrong with you, it looks like the garbage you are eating is catching up with your "A" for a$$. Nobody wants to be taunted by a garbage eating puppet.

- Suzanne Somers’s Torso Track: Have you seen that thing? You could lose a body part - but that is not the sort of weight loss I am after.

- Richard Simmons'  Workout DVDs: Well with the exception of his appearance on What's My Line with Drew Carey.

Tell us a gift you do not want to get for Christmas!

Thanks for the comments and votes. As always, your support is awesome. Freind requests accepted.