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Top Turkeys for 2011 - My Picks

It's Black Friday and I have to work - so I decided to pick some low hanging fruit out of this year's headlines. In no particular order, here is my list of turkeys for 2011. It's nothing personal, it's just that they made the news and caused me to shake my head in disbelief.

- Kim Kardashian:
If you are going to have a starter marriage, I think it should last like 6 months at least. In Kardashian years I have been married 45.625 years - I guess that is better than 45.1 dog years.

- Lindsay Lohan: Ms. Lohan should be the top contestant on the game show: I'd Like to Buy A Clue. Apparently there is something she isn't getting about life.

- Charlie Sheen: I think you need to join the cast of 3 Men and  Baby - as the baby.

- Canucks Fans: You lose a game in which your goal tender sucked, and then you light the city on fire? Brilliant.

- Joe Paterno: I am going to find it really hard to not wish a for pigeon poop on your statue.

- NBA: I am glad my kids don't look up to any of you!

- The Red Sox: The most amazing melt down!

- The Mayans: If you can predict the end of the world, why couldn't you predict your own demise?

- Muammar Gaddafi: Well, finally - hey you've been an idiot for almost my entire lifetime. What did you think was going to happen?

Government and Politics:
- The US Congress Super Committee: Just like Kindergartners fighting over a toy. Pretty soon you will have no approval rating at all.

- Rick Perry: Ummm, presidential candidates need to debate, I'm just sayin' - it's part of the job description.

- Barak Obama: We need jobs, and you are pardoning a turkey. Oh, and thanks for the birth certificate.

- Occupy Wall Street: You started with a great message which resonated with the American public, and then the violence started. I am just wondering why you don't run a candidate? The Taxed Enough Already (TEA) party is now more popular than you are...

- Donald Trump: Mostly because of the hair, but also because you are annoying.

- Casey Anthony Jury: What were you doing in there for six weeks, waiting for a book deal?

OK, who did I miss?

40 votes + -


aliciagetshealthy wrote 121 months ago:
You forgot the guy in California who predicted the rapture in the spring - "oops, I miscalculated, I meant the fall" ... "oops, wrong again, but hey, thanks for all the hundreds of thousands of dollars you donated to me" =)
kardowling wrote 121 months ago:
GREAT Blog..So sad the Red Sox earned their spot this year. I'm keepin the faith for 2011.
kardowling wrote 121 months ago:
Oopsie...2012. LOL! Still in Turkey haze.......
fitzie63 wrote 121 months ago:
Interesting. You may wish to re-consider the quip about Mayan history. I lived in their homeland for 18 months and learned a lot. Not a very nice quip.
Hoppymom wrote 121 months ago:
Where do you begin to rate the worst? There were so many and they are oblivious to their repugnance to the rest of us. Would someone with a brain please run for office? Oh, and could they not be a knee jerk reactionary: someone who can think before they speak? Some genuine, high moral standards would be nice. Newt Gingritch was pointing fingers at Clinton and was sleeping around himself. WTHeck!? Yes, I am pointing my finger at both of them.
As for the celebrities...mental illness is one thing, hubris is another. AAAARRRGGGHHH!!!I would put everyone of these people or groups on my list. with the possible exception of the Mayans. Trying to keep and open mind on that one, just not so open my brains fall out. Dont think it'll be the end of the world but I think a major change of some kind is possible.
hhorncastle wrote 121 months ago:
Fun article! Thanks for the giggles. Who did you miss? People who use "you're" when they should be using "your", etc. (Like in your Canucks Fans paragraph, for example.<grin>)
dsjohndrow wrote 121 months ago:
Damn - you got me. But it has disappeared!
jaeone wrote 121 months ago:
The All presidents pardon one turkey every year!
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