Today is the Day to Live
Posted on 3/28/2017 by dsjohndrow
I woke up a 6 AM on April 4th. I called into work sick. I felt like throwing up. In fact I had for a couple of days. I decided to call my doctor and left a message with his answering service. I was certain there was something he could do to make me comfortable. His office finally called back at 9 AM.
You can come in at 3:30 or meet him in the ER where he is on duty.
I felt so baldy I decided to go to the ER. In fact I felt bad enough to call 911, but first I would let my now ex-wife what my plans were. This week is the 6th anniversary of the day I suffered congestive heart failure. It's a big deal. You know it took a year to complete Couch to 5K.
Some of you know that I have cancer and I am working through the treatment options. Cancer sucks.
If I were to make a list of the crap that has gone down in the last few years I would probably shoot myself before I finished writing it. But I am focusing on my progress not my history. I have lost almost 90 pounds and went from a wheezing-fat-old-guy to a slimmer, fitter runner who can knock out a 6 mile run in less than an hour.
How does one live with cancer? You live life on purpose.
You plan to do things you were putting off, and put off things you were planning. You say I love you more and get a second goodbye kiss. You look up friends you haven't seen in a while. You shut out the people that minimize your feelings by saying, "It's early, at least you won't die.", "My dad had that and he was fine." or "My uncle had that an he died." When surgery has the potential to reduce your quality of life instead of make it better, it's not an easy option to choose.
As surgery number - WTFE - is coming in a few weeks, I am not thrilled. Not even close. It's not like my knee surgery or heart surgery which made my life better. It could be life-changing.
It's not the same.
As a runner I have overcome a lot. Most of it was mental. I just didn't think I could do anything. I even had medication and doctors opinions to bolster my excuses. I found a hundred reasons to quit, and only one to help me succeed: a better life. How I feel at the end of a run is the only reward I have. It's not the bling, the cheering, the personal accomplishments, no it's how I feel.
I remember back when a 5K was about as daunting a run as I ever thought I could face. I ran it. a few weeks I am running the Boston 5K as part of the marathon weekend.
I really can't wait!
For today, I am watching the calories, flossing my teeth, engaging my family, working, praying and living in the moment. Tomorrow may never come, and I don't know if I've "got this". I don't know if I will win against the Big-C or not. I just know that I am looking forward to hugging my kid, catching a little sunshine, making a co-worker smile, and letting the things of God swirl around in my spirit.
In the meantime, I have signed up for a a couple of 5Ks, a 10K a 10-miler and the Berlin Marathon in September. I plan on being there.
Thanks for the votes and comments. And thanks for your support.
Don't put off things that are important to you for a future that may never come.
Make your life a life that YOU consider to be worth living.
From what I read about you you are doing it all correct, the rest can be considered as distractions.
Live!
After all we are only immortal for a limited time.