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The Whole 9 Shebangs

I have traveled a lot, and even in my town I meet folks for who English is a second language. For me, the language of nutrition and fitness is a second language. I mean, when I started, I thought a burpee was a couple of bodily functions gone wrong - like a hickcough.

My neighbor is Brazilian and I love his accent and fractured idioms! My favorite is "the whole 9 shebangs."

It got me to thinking about some of the sayings Americans use (don't like it, piss off no offense to the rest of the world) in day to day life. What if nutrition and fitness was my first language, what would they mean then? How would they change?

- As easy as [tofu] pie!

- The bee's knees [needed arthoscopic surgery].

- As happy as an [unfried] clam.

- Big fish in a small pond: now a meal for four.

- Blast from the past: before pics!

- Catch 22: Could be good or bad depending on whether it is a filling 22 calorie snack food or a 22 pound weight gain.

- Brownie points: Colon cleansing.

- Chick flick: Half a chicken tender.

- Close but no cigar: 200.1 lbs on the scale damn it!

- Cold turkey: unhealthy processed meats filled with sodium.

- Doom and gloom: A 1000 calorie a day diet.

- Fancy pants: 2 sizes smaller then the ones from last month!

- Ethnic cleansing: No more pizza and beer!

- Fanny farm: Where we used to live before C25K.

- Going postal: Mail order diet food.

- Heavy metal: Fitbits, GPS units and HRMs.

- Identity Theft: After pics!

- In the bag: Purchase healthy food.

- Jump the gun: Run your first 5K!

- Kangaroo court: Message boards.

- Jump the shark: Mad fitness workout!

- Kit and caboodle: Properly fitting sports bra or other undergarment.

- Lame duck: Posting that you are not going to log for a few days.

- Off the record: Not logging all your food.

- Pi$s off: Getting ready to weigh in.

- Play by ear: New running tunes!

- Red letter day: Over your calories.

- Sold down the river: Health food store is too far from the house.

- Spill the beans: In the south = peanut farts, up north = eating a high protein/high fiber diet.

- Tuckered out: Week 3 of C25K. :)

- Zero tolerance: Rules for not adding friends.

Thanks for reading along! I appreciate the votes and comments. Feel free to add your own.

93 votes + -

11 comments:

LauraDubbleya wrote 114 months ago:
LOL@Tuckered Out.. yup, thats me, week three and wondering if I'll make week 4!!
Great post as always!!
beebee0925 wrote 114 months ago:
Brownie points. hee hee. :)
Denjo060 wrote 114 months ago:
as always another job well done Kudos to you keep on writing Love It
smor27 wrote 114 months ago:
Kudos for the laughs..
sk2775 wrote 114 months ago:
I am being a lame duck right now ;-(
felicity866 wrote 114 months ago:
'in the pink'...the colour i am after a workout!!...great post!!!
LastSixtySix wrote 114 months ago:
This is precious jsjohnsdrow!!! Such fun. The only thing I thought of was the funny ways my aunt would complain. One time, she told my neice that she was "about as useful as a chocolate teapot." As for me, exercising outdoors in triple-digit heat can make you "one crisp cookie".
fishermanbob wrote 114 months ago:
another great post
Gloria67648 wrote 114 months ago:
Love it!
sxci8 wrote 114 months ago:
Haha... Loved a few on here. Fave is identity theft though. Can't wait to pull that off ;)

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