The biggest news in the US since the discovery of the end of the Mayan Calendar, is the liquidation of Hostess. The bakers of orgasmic sweet treats have ceased operations! With Twinkie prices in the hundreds of dollars on eBay, they should have invested in their own product. Maybe the US government should have bought some too!

For some, the Hostess Twinkie was comfort food, and for others it satisfied their deepest sexual fantasies. Twisted, I know.

As grade school kids, the Twinkie, as well as the other Hostess treats provided us with "safe" derogatory names to one up our pathetic friends during recess. "Don't be a Twinkie you Ding Dong!" could be shouted on the playground with not even a glance from the teachers. (Sort of like the "F" and "A" words now.)

I guess I must admit, even as a healthfood nut, the very fact that there was a rack of Twinkies, Ho Ho's, Donettes and Sno Balls just a few houses away, was comforting. Every time I would fill up with gasoline, I could see them peering at my obese figure manly physique as I stood there, hose in hand, pumping fuel. I would have to slowly shake my head no, and look in another direction until the longing subsided.

The iconic magic is gone; my sweet mistresses are dead. R. I. P.  Monocalcium Phosphate.

In the '60s and '70s , Twinkies were a treat (read that shut the kid up at the grocery store). The truth is that the WASP Soul Food (All in the Family Reference) was never my first choice. I love Sno Balls. In fact my wife and I love Sno Balls. It all came out in pre-marriage counseling; it was part of the initial attraction. We even thought of putting them on the tables at the wedding reception. The truth be known, there is a picture of me pretending to have pink coconut covered breasts that has not yet surfaced on the Internet. I think they make me a B cup.

If you go back in my food diary, the evidence is there!

I confess, we did check the empty golden rack at a few convenience stores last night, and had to settle for a stale chocolate chip cookie for desert.

I guess the programmers at MFP knew what we didn't, they don't even track Twinkie ingredients in the macros! These elements [See Below] are so rare that I had to add about a dozen of them to my spellchecker just to write this obituary.

So what was your favorite Hostess Snack?

Thanks for the votes and comments (you can do both!) Please help make this a Top 10 by sharing it with your MFP friends. :)

Twinkie Ingredients:
Enriched wheat flour, sugar, corn syrup, niacin, water, high fructose corn syrup, vegetable and/or animal shortening - containing one or more of partially hydrogenated soybean, cottonseed and canola oil, and beef fat, dextrose, whole eggs, modified corn starch, cellulose gum, whey, leavenings (sodium acid pyrophosphate, baking soda, monocalcium phosphate), salt, cornstarch, corn flour, corn syrup, solids, mono and diglycerides, soy lecithin, polysorbate 60, dextrin, calcium caseinate, sodium stearoyl lactylate, wheat gluten, calcium sulphate, natural and artificial flavors, caramel color, yellow No. 5, red #40.