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Fitness is a Religion

Since the beginning of mankind, religion has often turned the world upside down. Everyone has an opinion about the unseen whether it's good, bad or somewhere in between. They worship, they teach, they hope, they pray, and they even spread the word about their personal enlightenment.

Folks can be just as religious about fitness!

That's right, some of us have become enlightened and now everyone needs to become like us! What, you don't believe me? Here are the basics constructs of religion.

Belief in Supernatural Being, Deity or Absolute: fitness-ians believe that the calories are supernatural. Then sneak in at night and shrink your clothes and meddle with the zero balance on the scale.

Sacred and Profane Objects: Sacred objects include the scale, skinny jeans, the tape measure, cute running shoes and skirts and the almighty fitness-tracker. The profane; beer, chocolate, ice cream, donuts, wings and pizza.

Rituals: Morning runs and badass gym sessions, and scale worship is like daily vespers. Then there is something akin to high mass like cheat days.

Moral Code: You must eat clean, lift heavy, do intervals, or zip your pants. There are many factions.

Religious Feelings: I ate donut, I feel fat. I ate a salad I feel skinny. I ran a marathon and I am sore.

Prayer: There are wrote prayers like the names we call the scale. It's a universal language. Then there is the second donut prayer and the skipped my workout prayer before ascending to the Altar of Poundage. (I heard the Brits get stoned there.) Add to this the religious high celebrations like the race PR and PB on the bench press or squat rack.

A World View: Our world is about weight and rarely about fitness. We have a hard time seeing ourselves as we really are. We say it's OK to have curves and type II diabetes. But then we hit a goal or two and sanity clears our vision.

Intolerance: Skinny people make us angry enough to trip them on the escalator at the mall. Heavy lifting experts are just posers, while super-fast runners are just plain raceholes.

Divine Destiny: We are dream of the afterlife of being strong, fast, well defined, sexy and skinny somewhere in life.

Problem of Evil Explained: We know about sugar, Aspartame and GMO's, just ask us!

A Social Group Bound Together: Umm, we are here on MFP and collect out pathetic selves in Facebook running groups.

Belief in a Sacred Scripture: Fad diets and training experts are everywhere, but heretics like me have written their own.

Thanks for reading along. I appreciate the votes and comments.

42 votes + -

13 comments:

johnwhitent wrote 68 months ago:
I confess my sins - beer, chocolate, ice cream, donuts, wings and pizza.
jmnicholas wrote 68 months ago:
Love the 'Brits get stoned' comment !
cbmcphillips wrote 68 months ago:
My sins are the same as john's... lol??
MonicaA2013 wrote 68 months ago:
YES just YES !!! ROFLMAO This is yet another great post !!
allmannerofthings wrote 68 months ago:
Yes! and so many blog post are Confessions - people seeking atonement (extra workouts) and absolution (its OK we've all been there just move on) from their sins (OMG I ate THIIIS much)
Laura80111 wrote 68 months ago:
Justification is really important when on the "weightloss / diet" path to "healthy and/or skinny". Every oatmeal cookie is on the healthy path....I'm sure with it's oatmeal, eggs, wheat, and some raisins for fruit...yep I can tell you just about everything is healthy and good for you....but if you gain weigh I am unavailable for help.
redperphexion wrote 68 months ago:
It's funny, but because in some cases it does get to this (scary?) level. Thanks for the reminder to keep shifting perspectives, and live with a light heart.
FarmerCarla wrote 68 months ago:
I'm a Christian and intend to stay that way, so thanks for the warning! I must keep fitness in perspective. Funny thing, after I started running again 4 years ago. I started praying as I ran and asked God to give me spiritual perseverance and to use me. He lead me to a wonderful singing/ministering group, but fitness isn't one of their priorities. Now, I'm still singing, but trying to work fitness back into my schedule. I'm sure God wants me to be fit, spiritually and physically.
Bee_Le wrote 68 months ago:
No one can judge me but the scale. Praise to all knowing scale. Hahaha. :D
estivita1 wrote 68 months ago:
Very thought provoking. Before I read your post, I was just thinking about how I could incorporate exercise as part of my morning devotion.
sadinplaid wrote 68 months ago:
Sinner in the house!Lol. Great comparison! I've actually been starting to think that my husband probably feels like I've joined a cult - "Must exercise, must not booze, listen to me go on and on about my new workout class..." :)
VeganAmandaJ wrote 68 months ago:
Haha.. this is fantastic and funny but true. It can feel very religious at times. Jokes aside, I consider myself very religious, as in I practice a religion seriously and there are many similarities as far as devotion and the amount of effort one needs to put in to this "way of life". My religion is a way of life for me and so fitness/health became that way as well and it felt as if I was giving priority to my fitness/health lifestyle rather than focusing on my spiritual routine (such as study of the bible and talking to others about it), instead of strengthening my relationship with God, I felt like I was just focusing on my own physical strength and well being. Of course taking care of my body is super important and I definitely need to lose a lot of weight to be healthy and I do realize this was all in jest but there are parallels indeed; I realize I'm getting a little deep and long winded here.
SO, for me, trying to find a balance. We can't "serve two masters" as the bible says, so trying to put God first while getting fit and healthy is hard. It seems really dumb that it would be hard because of course God wants people to be healthy and take care of their bodies with exercise but it's difficult not to get absorbed into focusing all my energy into fitness and food. At the same time there are so many temptations since there are many more people that are unconcerned with their health/fitness. It's like another scripture about "staying on the cramped and narrow road to life", not everyone wants to work on their weight/health/fitness etc.. and even encourage unhealthy lifestyles of inactivity and food in excess or unhealthy foods.
Anyway, I could go on, but I think you get the point. All in good fun yet some truths there..
Now that I've written a story, I wanted to say that I love all of your posts, you write well and it's funny. Thanks.

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