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Cancer Sucks- Being Strong Is Hard

Some days you don't feel like being strong. You need to dig deep to find a reason to keep on living like this. I still have yearly colonoscopies to check for colon tumors and I am happy to report that instead of biopsies, I am monitoring my cancer with MRIs. Here is an exceprt from my new book on one of my not so strong days.

 

When the colonoscopy and biopsy days came, I would start my prep, work from home and manage it. Those days the emotions would work hard at generating fear and anxiety, ending in irritable frustration. I was living alone in my little one-bedroom apartment. I remember coordinating my work calls between bathroom runs. It was hard to concentrate. I had decided to cook a turkey so I would have food during my recovery period. Forgetting it needed to thaw, I had forgotten to purchase it in time. 

 I used the bathroom in hopes of holding on while I rushed to the supermarket a few doors down. I made a list on a sticky note to minimize my time in the store. I jumped in my car, pulled into traffic and a moment later I was parked and walking into Hannafords. I grabbed a basket, plopped a turkey in it and then found the stuffing, onion, apples, walnut and an aluminum baking pan. I dropped everything on the cashier’s conveyor belt. She rang it up. It was $19 or something. I reached for my wallet. I had left it at home. I just began to cry. It was all too much. “I’m sorry.” I blubbered. “I’m having a procedure tomorrow and I am a little out of sorts.”

“Oh honey, it’s OK. What are you having done?” The cashier asked.

 “A biopsy. I just don’t like them.” I saw her name tag. It said Donna. I started to ask Donna if she could set my purchase aside when she made her way around to the front of the payment terminal and swiped her personal debit card and  paid for my groceries.

“God bless you, sir. I hope it’s good news.” Come back and let me know how you are doing. I am always here on Thursdays. I thanked her more times than I could count. I went home and put my turkey in the refrigerator. Then I lay in bed, my mind racing, tears, and utter despair swept over me. Today - the next day or so, I would be in the “worry about cancer” compartment. Gratitude and fear of the unknown were the anchors of those thoughts and feelings.

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20 comments:

kendallvon wrote 24 months ago:
That was so very moving, Dave. Thank you for sharing. <3
dsjohndrow wrote 24 months ago:
Thank you.
Rosie5151 wrote 24 months ago:
I felt everything you were saying. Bless Donna's heart for being so kind that day to you. Some days we all can use a little kindness, especially lately. I hope you and her have become friends or at least comfort buddies when you see her.

Thanks for sharing such a horrible time in your life .
rachelleahsmom wrote 24 months ago:
The world needs more Donnas.
Anonymous wrote 23 months ago:
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Anonymous wrote 23 months ago:
A REAL AND GENUINE SPELL CASTER THAT HELPED ME GET MY EX HUSBAND BACK
CONTACT DR JUMBA VIA WHATSAPP  : +19085174108
OR EMAIL HIM VIA : wiccalovespelltools@yahoo.com
WEBSITE : drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com  .
 I am overjoyed because my prayers have finally been answered,i have always wished to have my ex husband back,because i wanted my family to be happy again, until i met DR JUMBA who solved my problems for me, and i am sharing this testimony because i believe they are people out there who need solutions to problems like this. When my ex husband left me I was very much devastated and I always wanted back and it got to a period I no longer wanted him back again. After 7 years, my first son was 12 years old, he came home from school and said he was missing his father and all the love he showed when he was around him. The feeling rushed through me like an emotional straining and I had a huge urge to have him back. What happened to us that we separated was what I couldn't think of what started the fight. I contacted DR JUMBA online after reading about him of how he has been helping other people with their problems. I contacted his email at wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com and I was able to speak with him. I am happy and very overjoyed that after 7 years, all I wanted was to be reunited with my family and make my life whole again. Thank God for this great and real spell caster DR JUMBA. and i want everyone who have same problem as i had to contact this great man at (wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com)or you can add him up on his whatsapp via +19085174108 , website : drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com
and share your testimony with the world. blog : https://wiccaspelltools.blogspot.com/
Anonymous wrote 23 months ago:
I just got my ex husband back through the help of Dr Unity love spells Experts. My husband left me for another woman, This was just 3 years of our marriage. The most painful thing is that I was pregnant with our second baby. I wanted him back. I did everything within my reach to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so badly because of the love I had for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to my friend and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back , I had no choice than to try it. I messaged the spell caster called dr unity, and he assured me there was no problem and that everything will be okay before 11 hours. He cast the spell and surprisingly 11 hours later my husband called me. I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that had happened He wanted me to return to him. He also said he loved me so much. I was so happy and went to him that was how we started living together happily again.thanks to dr unity . if you are here and your Lover is turning you down, or your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore, contact Dr.Unity for help now..Here his contact, WhatsApp him: +2348055361568 {or} Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com ,his website:https://unityspells.blogspot.com .
Anonymous wrote 23 months ago:
Am Laura Mildred by name, i was diagnosed with Herpes 4 years ago i lived in pain with the knowledge that i wasn't going to ever be well again i contacted so many herbal doctors on this issue and wasted a large sum of money but my condition never got better i was determined to get my life back so one day i saw Mr. Morrison Hansen post on how Dr. Emu saved him from Herpes with herbal medicine i contacted Dr. Emu on his Email: Emutemple@gmail.com we spoke on the issue i told him all that i went through and he told me not to worry that everything will be fine again so he prepared the medicine and send it to me and told me how to use it, after 14 days of usage I went to see the doctor for test,then the result was negative, am the happiest woman on earth now thanks to Dr. Emu God bless you. Email him at: Emutemple@gmail.com Call or Whats-app him: +2347012841542 
Anonymous wrote 23 months ago:
get your ex back with a love spell that works fast.
Dr.Jumba   has helped thousands of women get their Ex boyfriends back using his real effective love Spell. After my boyfriend of one year broke up with me, I could barely speak without crying. I felt blindsided and didn't know what to do. I didn't know if I could get him back and the anxiety was unbearable. I needed him back desperately because I loved him so much. So I contacted this great spell caster for help. He helped me cast a return love spell on him and just within 11 hours my boyfriend came back to me crying and begging for my forgiveness. Dr. Jumba released him to know how much I loved and wanted him. And He also opened his eyes to picture how much love we have shared together. As I am writing this testimony right now I am the happiest woman on earth. I want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution to a love break up. Email him at   wiccalovespelltools@yahoo.com , wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com  or Call/WhatsApp him:  +19085174108    "I'm so grateful and can say that if you have been broken up with and want to get that person back, Dr.Jumba   is the best! I'll never forget how much he helped me  
  WEBSITE : drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com blog : https://wiccaspelltools.blogspot.com/ 
Anonymous wrote 23 months ago:
I have been suffering from Herpes for the past 3 years and 8 months, and ever since then i have been taking series of treatment but there was no improvement until i came across testimonies of Dr Sayo on how he has been curing different people from different diseases all over the world, then i contacted him as well. After our conversation he sent me the medicine which i took according to his instructions. When i was done taking the herbal medicine i went for a medical checkup and to my greatest surprise i was cured from Herpes. My heart is so filled with joy. If you are suffering from Herpes or any other disease you can contact Dr Sayo today on this Email address: (sayoherbalhealer@gmail.com) or WhatsApp him on this Tell.Number +2349012175679 Visit his FB page: https://www.facebook.com/Sayo-Herbal-Healer-100145798345000/    also visit website: http://sayoherbalhealinghome.com/ or check blogs: https://naturerootandherbscures.blogspot.com/
Anonymous wrote 23 months ago:
Thanks dr jumba you promised and you did it god almighty will continue to bless you as you help people reunite their broken relationship and broken marriages .  I never thought I will smile again, My husband left me with two kids for one year, All effort to bring him back failed I thought I'm not going to see him again not until I met a lady called rose who told me about a spell caster called DR jumba, She gave me his email address and mobile number and I contacted him and he assured me that within 48hours my husband will come back to me, In less than 48hours my husband came back started begging for forgiveness saying it is the devils work, so I'm still surprise till now about this miracle,i couldn't conceive but as soon as the spell was cast,i became pregnant and gave birth to my third child,if you need any assistance from him you can contact him via: email:  wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com  or Call/WhatsApp him:  +19085174108  BLOG : blog : https://wiccaspelltools.blogspot.com/  
WEBSITE:  drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com 
Anonymous wrote 22 months ago:
effective and powerfull love spell to return ex lover contact dr jumba Call/WhatsApp him:  +19085174108   
my fiance broke up with me last week i was so sad I changed completely, I wasn't eating and i wasn't talking to anybody, I cried a lot,I was so depressed and stressed out that I was scared I'm going to end up in the hospital because of all the stress and depression until one day i search online on getting love tips because I Love & care about him deeply and I just want us to be together as a couple again and I want us to last forever then i found a powerful spell caster Called dr jumba that he solved so many relationship problem then dr jumba told me he will come back to me between 24hrs after he cast spell on him never believe it until my finance called me on the phone and told me he want us to come back and live happily together forever , Am so happy now that dr jumba help me bring my finance back to me. Thanks so much dr jumba he can also help you Email him via:  wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com  or Call/WhatsApp him:  +19085174108   : blog : https://wiccaspelltools.blogspot.com/  
WEBSITE:  drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com   
Anonymous wrote 20 months ago:
I feel so blessed again in my marriage after Doctor jumba brought back my husband that separated with me for good 6 months. Even though i have mouths all over my body, it won't be enough to thank Doctor  jumba  for his help upon my life. My husband separated with me for the 6 months and have been in pains and agony without him. So, i searched for help everywhere but nothing worked out not until i meant Doctor  jumba  who i contacted online. I explained my situation to him and he promised that my husband will get back to me within 24 to 48 hours as far that my heart still beats for him. I believed in him and he prepared a spell for me and my husband called me exactly when Doctor  jumba   said. He pleaded and said he needs me back and now we are living happily again for the past 9 months. Everyone out there reading my article that needs help should contact him.  via
call : +19085174108 or wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com for more information 
Anonymous wrote 19 months ago:
Omg I Finally Got Helped  !! I'm so excited right now, I just have to share my testimony on this Forum.. The feeling of being loved takes away so much burden from our shoulders. I had all this but I made a big mistake when I cheated on my wife with another woman  and my wife left me for over 4 months after she found out..  I was lonely, sad and devastated. Luckily I was directed to a very powerful spell caster Dr Emu who helped me cast a spell of reconciliation on our Relationship and he brought back my wife and now she loves me far more than ever.. I'm so happy with life now. Thank you so much Dr Emu, kindly Contact  Dr Emu Today and get any kind of help you want.. Via Email emutemple@gmail.com or Call/WhatsApp +2347012841542
Anonymous wrote 19 months ago:
I am here to spread this good news to the entire world on how Dr Emu helped me solve my infertility problem and i am so happy now that i am now a mother because for over 4 years i have been trying to get pregnant and needed help, i and my husband always go for medical check up and the doctor always say that the both of us are fine and i have nowhere else to get help from and all hope was almost lost until one day i visited a friend of mine and i told her what i was passing through and she introduce me to this great spell caster called Dr Emu who helped her when she was in need of help, so i took a try to contact Dr Emu through his email and i explain all my problem to him and after we have talked he perform an infertility spell for me and after that he told me what i should do, and i followed the instruction he gave and after that he instructed to sleep with my husband and also i followed the instruction and he said that the next week i should go for medical check up and the doctor confirmed that i was 4 months pregnant and i was so happy that all my sorrows were gone for ever, i am so very happy now and also you need any kind of help or the same line with mine, contact Dr Emu on his email: emutemple@gmail.com or Call/Text his whatsapp phone number +2347012841542
Anonymous wrote 15 months ago:

Getting your lover or your ex back has been made more easy by this powerful spell caster called Dr Odion. I am Rose by name and i am from canada, the only reason why i am on this site is to thank this powerful spell caster called DR. Odion and you can improve your relationship success by contacting him through these details (wisdomspiritualtemple@gmail.com Or call +2348136482342) This powerful spell caster did me a huge favor by helping me get my lover back to me within the speed of light and since then my relationship has been perfect.

any problem of yours.He is specialized in the following:

(1)Spell for protection from danger
(2)Spell for magic
(3)Spell for same sex love
(4)Spell for healing
(5)Spell for invisibility
(6)Spell for riches and fame
(7)Spell to get a good job
(8)Spell for strong love and relationship
(9)Spell to bring your ex back
(10)speII for Lottery
This man has great powers and is incredibly generous.You can contact him on
(wisdomspiritualtemple@gmail.com)
Anonymous wrote 14 months ago:
Its a real miracle Till today i still imagine how dr 0love brought back my man after he had vowed never to set his eyes on me again. he had even set the date for his wedding with another woman before i contacted dr 0love.
He told me to leave everything to him because i told him if the wedding takes place i would commit suicide.
After he cast the spell for me my man came back to me and said he wants to still marry on that date and the woman he wants is me and am so happy to announce that our wedding is coming up in 2 weeks time and i am still in contact with dr 0love till date because he is a very powerful man and a man to be trusted. CONTACT DR 0LOVE ON email: doctor0lovespell@gmail.com OR whatsapp him on: +1 (201) 781-2375 You can also visit his FB page: https://www.facebook.com/Lovespellthatworkfastusa  or view his website: ttps://doctor0lovespell.wordpress.com/
Anonymous wrote 14 months ago:
HOW I GOT MY EX HUSBAND BACK WITH THE HELP OF REAL AND EFFECTIVE SPELL BY doctor0lovespell@gmail.com  My name is Wendy Ruth, I never thought I will smile again, My husband left me with two kids for one year, All effort to bring him back failed I thought I’m not going to see him again not until I met a lady called Jesse who told me about a spell caster called Dr. 0love , She gave me his email address and mobile number and I contacted him and he assured me that within 24hours my husband will come back to me, In less than 24hours my husband came back started begging for forgiveness saying it is the devils work, so I’m still surprise till now about this miracle, i couldn’t conceive but as soon as the spell was cast, i became pregnant and gave birth to my third child, if you need any assistance from him you can contact him via: email: doctor0lovespell@gmail.com Or WhatsApp or call him now: +1 (201) 781-2375 You can also visit his FB page: https://www.facebook.com/Lovespellthatworkfastusa  or view his website: https://doctor0lovespell.wordpress.com/
susanchristaint wrote 11 months ago:
Hello to everyone out here, I am here to share the unexpected miracle that happened to me … My name is Susan Christian , I live in London, UK. we got married for more than 9 years and have gotten two kids. thing were going well with us and we are always happy. until one day my husband started to behave in a way i could not understand, i was very confused by the way he treat me and the kids. later that month he did not come home again and he called me that he want a divorce, i asked him what have i done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying is that he want a divorce that he hate me and do not want to see me again in his life, i was mad and also frustrated do not know what to do, i was sick for more than 2 weeks because of the divorce. i love him so much he was everything to me without him my life is incomplete. i told my sister and she told me to contact a spell caster, i never believe in all this spell casting of a thing. i just want to try if something will come out of it. i contacted Dr Emu for the return of my husband to me, they told me that my husband have been taken by another woman, that she cast a spell on him that is why he hate me and also want us to divorce. then they told me that they have to cast a spell on him that will make him return to me and the kids, they casted the spell and after 24 hours my husband called me and he told me that i should forgive him, he started to apologize on phone and said that he still love me that he did not know what happen to him that he left me. it was the spell that Dr Emu casted on him that make him come back to me today, me and my family are now happy again today. thank you Dr Emu for what you have done for me i would have been nothing today if not for your great spell. i want you my friends who are passing through all this kind of love problem of getting back their husband, wife , or ex boyfriend and girlfriend to contact Dr Emu , if you need his help you can contact him through his private mail: emutemple@gmail.com or you can contact him through his website https://emutemple.wordpress.com/ fb page Https://web.facebook.com/Emu-Temple-104891335203341 and you will see that your problem will be solved without any delay.
Anonymous wrote 1 month ago:
I suffered from what they called peripheral artery disease (PAD). I have been suffering for years, Me and my wife searched for a medical cure, and then we came across a testimony of a man who suffered the same and was cured by Dr Chief Lucky. So my wife and I contacted Dr Chief Lucky via an email and thank God he replied. I explained what was wrong and he sent me herbal medicines that helped heal me completely. I am happy to say that herbal medicine is the ultimate and Dr Chief Lucky I am grateful. You can contact him on his email: chiefdrlucky@gmail.com or whatsapp: +2348132777335, Facebook page http://facebook.com/chiefdrlucky or website https://chiefdrlucky.com/. He said that he also specializes in the following diseases: ALS, CANCER, HPV, HERPES, DIABETES, HEPATITIS B, HIV, And more.

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