Some of you know that I have been around here for a few years. 2005 days to be exact. It's not that important. I stuck with the plan and lost a lot of weight, not to mention I can run a marathon, and fit in some much smaller clothes.

I also made some people on the message boards mad.

I have had a lot more than 5 surgeries since I showed up as a Photoshopped profile picture on MFP. The heart surgery was only cosmetic. :) I had my knee repaired and I liked that so much I also had my rotator cuff repaired too.

In the fall of 2013, just a few weeks before my first marathon, I had a surgical biopsy.

The diagnosis? A malignant tumor. WTF?! What I really wanted was liposuction and a tummy tuck to complete the weight loss process. According to the doctor, it was a small tumor. Compared to what, I don't know - maybe my head.

Cancer sucks. We all know why.

As a follow up, I have had 5 needle biopsies in 3 years. My previous experiences were not a lot of fun. I am pretty much immune to the effects of lidocaine, a local anaesthetic. Instead of switching me to something new, they gave me more of the one that doesn't work. Did I say I was pretty much immune to the effects?

You may want to cover the children's eyes.

Here is a half naked guy with an ultrasound probe strategically placed in the location where my ex-wife swears my head was. Truthfully it felt more like they took all the office furniture and shoved it up there. And oh damn, then they accidentally were a little rough on whatever it is up there that doesn't get a touch of local anesthesia. Then they proceed with the biopsy which feels like you were snapped with a large rubber band on the buttocks. 12 times.

Did I mention they took 2 needles to inject antibiotics, one of which was pure molten steel?

Before the procedure I was just wishing it was over because I know. After the procedure, I just wish I was dead. Recovery includes blood. Supposedly it's not much, but I consider mine almost as precious as that of Jesus. When given the option, I like to keep it in my body.

As I stated earlier, I have had a number of surgeries and none of them hurt like this.

The ladies are thinking, "oh, now you know what it's like to give birth." Well, I did ask for an epidural and never got one. But whatever it is I gave birth to, I won't have to send it to college or pay for a wedding.

When you have been diagnosed with cancer (4 times), you think about a lot of things.

Will I die? This sucks and will it suck more? What is the treatment? Can I run? Will I miss work? Will the treatment make me feel sick? And will I die? That questions shows up more often then, "Is there sex in Heaven?"

Venting a little helps. The problem is that someone would rather tell you about an uncle who died from cancer then spend much time just letting you ramble.

This week I gained access to the Berlin Marathon in September of 2017. So here I am, on the verge of one of the most amazing experiences of my lifetime (however long that is), and I don't get to think about it that much. I have to see the surgeon, and last I heard, my stage 1 cells were almost stage 2. We will discuss the treatment options soon.