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Black Friday Blues

Christmas is upon us whether we like it or not. The flood gates of marketing have switched gears from the elections (remember those?) to an onslaught of Santa themed music and cinnamon spiced lattes. It's hard to believe we stuffed out faces with turkey, creamed onions and pumpkin pie just a day or so ago!

Maybe it's me, but I just don't get the shopping frenzy. However...

This year I decided to try it - you know, Black Friday named after all the people who get trampled trying to by a half price Barbie Doll. Actually it's named for stores that need to be in the black during a selling season which accounts for as much as 40% or their yearly business.

I used to shop long before there were malls and the centerpiece of Christmas was toys and candy Jesus. We didn't really know what our Jewish friends did on Christmas. Horror of horrors, I later learned there was no fatted goose on their table. No, they confessed that they went out for Chinese; it was the only place open.

This year I awoke from my turkey coma at midnight - I mean thank God for Massachusetts blue laws which do not allow businesses to open on Thanksgiving Day! I used the bathroom (10 cups of water a day people!) and I went back to bed until 6:45 am. I watched the news of people trampled over the purchase of a Furby and had coffee with my wife.

After a couple of cups of joe, I was stoked!

I carefully made breakfast, did a few chores, played some refrigerator Tetris to have some left over turkey, rode the motorcycle for an hour, and had a good 5 mile rollerblade at the park, and then I was ready for combat!

I rolled about 3 PM. The enemy should never suspect your next move.

I went to the bank and got some cash; because some times you want to haggle. My first stop was Dick's sporting goods. There was no line, but it was a little crowded. On the escalator (after a turkey fart) I had plenty of personal space.

It was a lost cause, they were sold out of 182 cm round laces for my rollerblades!

Not to be defeated I headed over to REI, did a little parking surveillance, and pounced on a free parking spot - umm - between other free parking spots. They were sold out too. So I consoled myself by taking some Under Armour into the dressing room - that stuff is better than a body message. I mean it is orgasmic!

In the end, I bought nothing. I had no idea shoelaces would be so popular this year. :(

How about you, did you go shopping on Black Friday?

Post Update: I just watched the news of people ripping CDs from each others hands, woman tearing Victoria's Secret underwear to shreds, and worst of all, a 60" television hitting the floor in Best Buy. Barricades, fisticuffs, and brawls... Merry Christmas America.

51 votes + -


AmberJo1984 wrote 115 months ago:
And, that last paragraph is the reason I will NEVER go Black Friday Shopping. I love this time of year for the lights, music, and (most of all) spending time with family. Nothing is important enough to get into fights over.
JustLindaLou wrote 115 months ago:
Refrigerator Tetris - LOL!!!
cfreema wrote 115 months ago:
I always go Black Friday shopping in a little suburb outside of Tulsa. It's like bizarro land black friday. Everything is calm and smooth. No tearing, no pushing, no destroying. I even said, and was said to by others, oh here you go, need one too? sure you can go in front of me. no problem!

then i turn on the news and i am shocked! If black friday there was like black friday everywhere else, i would stay home too.
rmsrws wrote 115 months ago:
So it was the turkey that caused the FARTS not the baked beans.....I always learn from your blogs!! Thanks so much!!! I will never live in fear of eating beans again, now that I know that turkey was the culprit!!!
pghsteelerfan wrote 115 months ago:
There is no bargain worth taking a chance with your life...i dont want my family reading my epitaph::::she went down at wally's world for us so we can view this large screen TV!!:::::
bllowry wrote 115 months ago:
I only shop when I absolutely have to, so I've never done the Black Friday thing. When the kids were little I'd have my pressies bought, wrapped and hidden by the end of September. We no longer exchange gifts, as they're both married with households of their own, though that will change in May when the grandchild arrives!
angieroo2 wrote 115 months ago:
Under Armour is my favourite.
angieroo2 wrote 115 months ago:
As for Black Friday....the risk of getting trampled to death makes me want to avoid those sales, so I stay far far away.
Denjo060 wrote 115 months ago:
I have never been shopping on black Friday I just dont get it Id rather pay a higher price for something than stand out in the cold losing sleep and getting trampled. Merry Christmas to you
odditblue wrote 115 months ago:
I slept in this year. Got up late. Went in and upgraded my stupid phone rather late in the day. There ya go.
andreamkelly wrote 115 months ago:
Daughter, pregnant daughter in law and I all braved Target, which opened at 9 on Thursday. We got there a little after 7 and were about 70th in line. They had short fences to 'corral' the shoppers and staff was walking down the line handing out snacks, maps and answering everyone's questions. About 8:30pm, a county constable showed up and walked down the line wishing everyone a happy shopping trip. Target had it all together and we were in and out and a lot poorer about 40 minutes later. (Three shopping carts full) I did a little more shopping Friday morning, but didn't leave the house til later so it wasn't quite so hectic.
harleigh67 wrote 115 months ago:
I am anti-black friday because.. How is buying things that are made in China and sold here at discounted prices going to help the U.S. economy that I am worried about...Exactly! It's not BUY LOCAL SUPPORT U.S. SMALL BUSINESSES THIS YEAR! If you were one of those arrested at least your fines go locally!
deeannhill wrote 115 months ago:
Refrigerator Tetris! Bwahahaha!!!
polyxavier wrote 115 months ago:
REI--I remember when it was 4 stores--Seattle, Portland, Berkeley and Carson (LA).

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