You are viewing dsjohndrow's blog MyFitnessPal is a 100% Free Calorie Counter and Diet Plan

Cancer Sucks- Being Strong Is Hard

Some days you don't feel like being strong. You need to dig deep to find a reason to keep on living like this. I still have yearly colonoscopies to check for colon tumors and I am happy to report that instead of biopsies, I am monitoring my cancer with MRIs. Here is an exceprt from my new book on one of my not so strong days.

 

When the colonoscopy and biopsy days came, I would start my prep, work from home and manage it. Those days the emotions would work hard at generating fear and anxiety, ending in irritable frustration. I was living alone in my little one-bedroom apartment. I remember coordinating my work calls between bathroom runs. It was hard to concentrate. I had decided to cook a turkey so I would have food during my recovery period. Forgetting it needed to thaw, I had forgotten to purchase it in time. 

 I used the bathroom in hopes of holding on while I rushed to the supermarket a few doors down. I made a list on a sticky note to minimize my time in the store. I jumped in my car, pulled into traffic and a moment later I was parked and walking into Hannafords. I grabbed a basket, plopped a turkey in it and then found the stuffing, onion, apples, walnut and an aluminum baking pan. I dropped everything on the cashier’s conveyor belt. She rang it up. It was $19 or something. I reached for my wallet. I had left it at home. I just began to cry. It was all too much. “I’m sorry.” I blubbered. “I’m having a procedure tomorrow and I am a little out of sorts.”

“Oh honey, it’s OK. What are you having done?” The cashier asked.

 “A biopsy. I just don’t like them.” I saw her name tag. It said Donna. I started to ask Donna if she could set my purchase aside when she made her way around to the front of the payment terminal and swiped her personal debit card and  paid for my groceries.

“God bless you, sir. I hope it’s good news.” Come back and let me know how you are doing. I am always here on Thursdays. I thanked her more times than I could count. I went home and put my turkey in the refrigerator. Then I lay in bed, my mind racing, tears, and utter despair swept over me. Today - the next day or so, I would be in the “worry about cancer” compartment. Gratitude and fear of the unknown were the anchors of those thoughts and feelings.

11 votes + -

7 comments:

kendallvon wrote 3 weeks ago:
That was so very moving, Dave. Thank you for sharing. <3
dsjohndrow wrote 3 weeks ago:
Thank you.
Rosie5151 wrote 3 weeks ago:
I felt everything you were saying. Bless Donna's heart for being so kind that day to you. Some days we all can use a little kindness, especially lately. I hope you and her have become friends or at least comfort buddies when you see her.

Thanks for sharing such a horrible time in your life .
rachelleahsmom wrote 3 weeks ago:
The world needs more Donnas.
Anonymous wrote 1 week ago:
A GREAT SPELL CASTER (DR. JUMBA ) THAT HELP ME BRING BACK MY EX.I want to quickly write about a Powerful Love spell Caster that helped me when I had a misunderstanding with my husband which led to Divorce. I contacted this Powerful spell caster called Dr jumba  help and I followed the step that he asked and within 48 hours my husband called me and was eager for my forgiveness and that he wished nothing more than to have me in his arms forever. I am filled with so much joy and happiness that I found Dr jumba  , I hope you all here will find this testimony of mine and get your husband back in just 24 hours. He did a perfect job for me. I am So Happy and Excited because as i am writing this Testimony, My husband is madly in love with me again. If there is anybody Out there who is in Difficulties and need help should kindly Contact Dr jumba on His Email ID : wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com or text him on whatsapp : +19085174108  and he is Ready to Help you no matter the Situation, website : drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com blog : https://wiccaspelltools.blogspot.com/
Anonymous wrote 1 week ago:
A REAL AND GENUINE SPELL CASTER THAT HELPED ME GET MY EX HUSBAND BACK
CONTACT DR JUMBA VIA WHATSAPP  : +19085174108
OR EMAIL HIM VIA : wiccalovespelltools@yahoo.com
WEBSITE : drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com  .
 I am overjoyed because my prayers have finally been answered,i have always wished to have my ex husband back,because i wanted my family to be happy again, until i met DR JUMBA who solved my problems for me, and i am sharing this testimony because i believe they are people out there who need solutions to problems like this. When my ex husband left me I was very much devastated and I always wanted back and it got to a period I no longer wanted him back again. After 7 years, my first son was 12 years old, he came home from school and said he was missing his father and all the love he showed when he was around him. The feeling rushed through me like an emotional straining and I had a huge urge to have him back. What happened to us that we separated was what I couldn't think of what started the fight. I contacted DR JUMBA online after reading about him of how he has been helping other people with their problems. I contacted his email at wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com and I was able to speak with him. I am happy and very overjoyed that after 7 years, all I wanted was to be reunited with my family and make my life whole again. Thank God for this great and real spell caster DR JUMBA. and i want everyone who have same problem as i had to contact this great man at (wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com)or you can add him up on his whatsapp via +19085174108 , website : drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com
and share your testimony with the world. blog : https://wiccaspelltools.blogspot.com/
Anonymous wrote 5 hours ago:
I just got my ex husband back through the help of Dr Unity love spells Experts. My husband left me for another woman, This was just 3 years of our marriage. The most painful thing is that I was pregnant with our second baby. I wanted him back. I did everything within my reach to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so badly because of the love I had for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to my friend and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back , I had no choice than to try it. I messaged the spell caster called dr unity, and he assured me there was no problem and that everything will be okay before 11 hours. He cast the spell and surprisingly 11 hours later my husband called me. I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that had happened He wanted me to return to him. He also said he loved me so much. I was so happy and went to him that was how we started living together happily again.thanks to dr unity . if you are here and your Lover is turning you down, or your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore, contact Dr.Unity for help now..Here his contact, WhatsApp him: +2348055361568 {or} Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com ,his website:https://unityspells.blogspot.com .

Add Comment

Commenting as anonymous user

About Me
8a4564273fb7bd3e2ae5e0df8c1d7b179350 thumb
Tools
Archives
About MyFitnessPal
Join MyFitnessPal today and lose weight the healthy way. Get your own 100% free diet blog and calorie counter. Put away your credit card - you'll never pay a cent."

join now for free