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Back in the Groove

I am finally back in the groove. I confess, I don't like how I look, how I feel, or how I am progressing. I am running and eating correctly (for me). I can only say that I am back in the groove.

They used to say if you do it for 30 days, it will become a habit.

Right now, everything is still a struggle. Walking past the goodies in the breakroom, packing my own lunches, caring about portions, scheduling my runs... I am tired before I start. It is not automatic.

I do have excuses.

Life is real. My mother-in-law passed away last weekend. We traveled the 5 hours south to be there for family, friends, and to express our own grief and sorrow. Part of my job was to support my wife, and do what I could for her family.

You don't think about logging at times like that.

Planning to eat was more trouble than it was worth. I skipped a few meals. I found the treadmill a couple of times and got the job done. The in-room hot tub was nice, and despite the circumstances, it was nice to see everyone.

Then it was off to New York City.

If it was just a regular work week, I would have taken bereavement time. Unfortunately it was very specific training for my job. The conflict was tremendous. Do I stick around and support my wife, or take this very expensive, no refund, one-of-a-kind training.

The stress piled up as I tried to be in two places at once.

On top of all that, I had to plan transportation, cancel one hotel booking, find one in NJ and rebook at a new place in New York City. I missed the first day of training. I got up at 5:15 the next day to catch the limo service to NY.

I arrived in Times Square and rolled my suitcase and laptop to the 42nd floor.

At least I could relax a little in class. I settled in and tried not to worry about the outside world. I only had to find my hotel and grab something to eat. 

My low stress moments disappeared not long after.

It seems my back-up at work went missing. This is the person that should be able to do what I do if I am not there. On top of that, two subcontractors turned in some horrendous programming code.

My phone blew up. Texts and emails came in simultaneously in the middle of training along with a voice mail.

Really, you have to text me to say that you sent an email and then call me to say that you texted me and emailed me?! I skipped breakfast and got a small lunch for the rest of the week. It was just too much trouble and I didn't feel like eating anyway...

...well, until Thursday night. That is where the filet mignon was.

All bets were off. I ate the meat, had a non-alcoholic beer - no wait, two. And the sides were fantastic. I probably didn't go over my calories, but I felt bloated.

It's time to refocus.

I am back up to 6 miles running. They were ugly, but I did it. I didn't hurt and I didn't die. Come to think of it, I didn't chafe my boy parts or chub rub either.

Life it good - well worth living.

I am looking forward to meeting a long time MFP friend in London (and her family)! It also turns out that my best friend and best man is going to be visiting his parents on race day too. Of course Ruth will be there.

I have a lot of support.

I am logging again. Well, I started back and missed doing that for a week or so. Hey, I had excuses.

Thanks for the votes and comments. You can do both.

112 votes + -

22 comments:

SugarNtheRaw wrote 9 months ago:
We're rowing the same boat, and I am so sorry. My first week of college was last week, and Fiances' grandmother died that Monday morning. I'm missing out on the gym, and struggling to balance a full time job, 3 classes, and the gym, and the home life.
I know we've got this, but right now, everything feels like tar, and I'm tied to a brick.
BobbyDaniel wrote 9 months ago:
I am so in the same boat with you my brother!
josiereside1 wrote 9 months ago:
So sorry about the loss of your mother-in-law. Condolences to your family.
debk0718 wrote 9 months ago:
Life hands us all curve balls and we just have to do the best we can, under the stressful circumstances. It's not always have we initially react that defines us, it's the path forward that truly defines us. You're defining yourself, which may not seem like a lot, but it's what you're doing today, tomorrow and the days after that which will define just who you are. Who you are, I have to say, is someone who realizes what's going on and takes action. Hang in there. Life is not a bowl of freaking roses, not for me either.
MHChicago wrote 9 months ago:
I'm very sorry for your loss, and my condolences to your family. (I'm also sorry that you seem to work with some idiots.) Thank you for blogging about this. It's an important reminder that even when life hits us in the face we can get back on track.
Laura80111 wrote 9 months ago:
Sorry for your loss. Getting back into the routine sometimes is harder than the first time you started it as you KNOW what you are supposed to do and start thinking you can do it....tomorrow. Let today be your day and take it one day at a time. Lots of encouragement coming your way. Best thoughts for your run in London.
pizzafruit wrote 9 months ago:
Family loss is always a tough one and it appears you handled it well(although I don't think you think you handled it well at all). One foot in front of the other - you've got this.
izzybelle2013 wrote 9 months ago:
I thought I was having a bad week/month. Now I realize that my problems are nothing. You are doing the best you can under the circumstances, and that is all you can do. Your mfp friends love you and support you. Just know that you are not alone, even when it feels that way. Sending you good karma thoughts. Hope they help.
marlown wrote 9 months ago:
Thanks for sharing!
franklin505 wrote 9 months ago:
life sometimes gets in the way but your doing great.
juniorssister wrote 9 months ago:
I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your struggle, there's so much we can learn from each other. You give me encouragement I can do this. Let me give you encouragement as well. You've got this my friend
ggeise14 wrote 9 months ago:
You said it -- "getting back in the groove". Stumbling and falling is a part of most everyone's day/life but yes, regaining focus is the real deal!
WillWorkout4Food wrote 9 months ago:
There's a real connection and inspiration that occurs when reading truthful and honest accounts of life. There's a connection because at least on of those realities have affected someone at any given time and an inspiration as to how different people manage it. Thank you for this message. I often see people go into a rut based upon, well, real life events and there will always be something. I accidentally clicked on this message to the right of my screen and I'm grateful that I did. All the best to you now and always.
susie_que wrote 9 months ago:
I can so identify with emotions getting in the way. My ex-husband and his two sons called me after not hearing from them in 8 years. Our son died 10 years ago at age 20. I invited them for Christmas dinner and they still haven't left. Yep, I'm a soft touch sucker. They have all sorts of problems most being the ex who suffered a stroke after our son's death. So it has been real hard these last few weeks to focus on eating right and working out. I am so very sorry for your loss. You were there for your wife and still took care of business. I wish you success and you are in deed back in the groove.
dmd112495 wrote 9 months ago:
I NEEDED this right now; saw it at the perfect time.
hearingyou2 wrote 9 months ago:
It sounds like you are doing quite well overall with all the hurdles life threw at you lately. Good for you for getting going again. I, too, and struggling sometimes to log things because like you said I'm tired before I start and sometimes it seems to be "more trouble than it is worth." Then I log in later and catch up and it has been worth it. I am 51 and I have to surrender and accept that I need to do this (keep track, stay with good choices) as a lifestyle... forever until I don't. Which will be when I am done with this life. I just don't do well with my freewheeling eating and exercising habits which take me off the rails. I am happy right now to be feeling good after exercise... you know that good feeling and I'm sure you are feeling it too. Keep going!
bmeadows380 wrote 9 months ago:
I agree with the "doing something for 30 days will establish a habit" thing a myth. It's been a year since I started working on changing my eating patterns, and I can definitely say that even after a year, it is very easy to slip back into the old habits!
DougJackieSwartz wrote 9 months ago:
I’m sorry to hear about your loss. You handled the stress #likeaboss, and that protein was something your body needed. I have a personal training/sports nutrition biz and know that life can sometimes throw us a curve ball. Keep pressing on!
RodaRose wrote 9 months ago:
Thanks for your blog. I appreciate that you share your MFP life along with the rest of your life.
joegibbs2112 wrote 9 months ago:
Go Pats!
kdbulger wrote 9 months ago:
Life does happen, and sometimes it requires literally all of our focus. That's okay, you know how to do this and you know that with consistency will come your reward. I'm glad that you are back on track. My condolences to you and your wife. Be well.
lavachickie wrote 9 months ago:
It's really good to take the time to write all this down. This will help you see your patterns, your weak points, and your opportunities! It also helps show us all that we are only human. :)

Best wishes as you pursue improvement, but not perfection. :)

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