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Taking a step back.

19 May 2014
My Weight: 12st 3lbs (77.6kg or 171lbs)

Target Weight: 11st (69.9kg or 154lbs)

I am not putting in any effort at the moment when it comes to dieting and social media. I have however lost a pound.
As you know this blog is about my weight and wellbeing. It's not just about my health, it's also about my mental health. I have decided to step away from twitter, and a few other social media sites because instead of being a place I can be myself, it just seems to be a place that constantly makes me feel like I don't belong. I have written a blog about it on my main blog if you are interested...
I need to try and change my mindset. I need to be positive. I will write in this blog again when I am ready.
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If you have a fitbit and would like to be my friend my profile is.

Losing focus & not losing weight.

28 April 2014
My Weight: 12st 4lbs (78kg or 172lbs)

Target Weight: 11st (69.9kg or 154lbs)

I haven't updated my blog for a few weeks as for the past few Mondays I've been busy. I don't like updating on another day so I would rather skip a week or two then update.
I haven't however skipped on logging into myfitnesspal or updating my weight. (I won't talk about my food diary as I have been rubbish at updating that.)
This week I have put on a pound. :-(
Woe.
I don't really know what to add to that. I am not happy about my weight but I just don't have the motivation to lose it. I feel sad today. Worrying about too many things that I know I shouldn't be worrying about. Stupid brain. Stupid tummy. Stupid food. etc.
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If you have a fitbit and would like to be my friend my profile is.

One Up.

7 April 2014
My Weight: 12st 3lbs (77.6kg or 171lbs)

Target Weight: 11st (69.9kg or 154lbs)

I didn't update last week as I was away on a course in London. I do know that my weight was 12st 2lbs before I left for London and 12st 3lbs when I returned. Woe.
I am not very good at losing weight anymore. I just don't have the drive or the commitment that I once had. 
My mood while in London had dropped. I started to feel low again. I just get this feeling of being detached and that I am acting a part. I try and enjoy myself but the sadness inside is hard to shake off. I also took a tumble so that didn't help matters.
I am feeling better now that I am home and I can get back into my routine again.
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If you have a fitbit and would like to be my friend my profile is.

12st 2lbs... again

24 March 2014
My Weight: 12st  2lb (77.1kg or 170lbs)

Target Weight: 11st (69.9kg or 154lbs)

Back to 12st 2lbs again! Those 2 lbs I lost last week are back on due to pigging out on my week off. I have also become a bit lazy at logging. I don't really monitor my diet anyway. Yeah, I know what you are thinking, how do I expect to lose weight if I don't make an effort.  Well, I will tell you... Magic! :-/
I have been feeling good about myself for the past two weeks. That's two whole weeks of feeling good. I haven't felt like my normal self for a while so two weeks has been a massive boost to my confidence and well being. I need to remember moments like this for the low times. When I am low I just get into a downward spiral of depression and doubt and I forget about the good times. I never want to feel low again.
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If you have a fitbit and would like to be my friend my profile is.

12 again

17 March 2014
My Weight: 12st (76.2kg or 168lbs)

Target Weight: 11st (69.9kg or 154lbs)

I am now 12st again! yay! I think it was down to all the heavy lifting I did at the weekend helping my friends move. I know I didn't lose the weight by eating less or eating better as I have been stuffing my face! :-)
I am in a much better mood this week too. I hope it lasts.
If you have a fitbit and would like to be my friend my profile is.

Stability

10 March 2014
My Weight: 12st  2lb (77.1kg or 170lbs)

Target Weight: 11st (69.9kg or 154lbs)

No weight change this week. I haven't really been doing anything to lose the weight. I went on a nice walk on the beach yesterday but it was then followed by beer and chips so I probably just put back on all the calories I burnt off.
This week is going to be a short working week for me and then I have the whole of next week off. I always think this will mean I will be more active but no, I will probably just be eating more.
My emotional level is stable at the moment. That's if I can learn to stop dwelling on things. :-/
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If you have a fitbit and would like to be my friend my profile is.

Blank. Blank.

3 March 2014
My Weight: 12st  2lb (77.1kg or 170lbs)

Target Weight: 11st (69.9kg or 154lbs)

I have put on a pound this week. Who knew that eating 5 doughnuts in one day would make a difference. It's only an extra 1105 calories. :-/
When it comes to emotions I am still a mess. I have so many grey days, and by that I mean that the are not bad or good days, just days of feeling empty and neutral.
I tried to write about it in my main blog but I couldn't really explain it...
...and I can't really explain how I feel here. I just feel blank.
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If you have a fitbit and would like to be my friend my profile is.

Blank.

24 Feb 2014
My Weight: 12st  1lb (76.7kg or 169lbs)

Target Weight: 11st (69.9kg or 154lbs)

No weight change this week. I feel like you might as well read last weeks blog update. I have been feeling a bit low of late. I want to keep on smiling but feel the mask is slipping.
If you have a fitbit and would like to be my friend my profile is.

Happy Mountain

17 Feb 2014
My Weight: 12st  1lb (76.7kg or 169lbs)

Target Weight: 11st (69.9kg or 154lbs)

No weight change this week. I am actually surprised that I haven't put any weight on. I've been going over my daily calorie allowence a lot over the past few days as I have hit a bit of a wall. I know losing weight isn't easy but I don't really have the same motivation and drive that I once had. I need to get my arse in gear.
My emotions are in flux as always. I really want to be a balanced person but I can see to find that happy medium. For the past two years it feels like being happy is a uphill struggle. Let's say that happiness is a mountain. I have support team that helps me get to the top but when I do get to the top of "happy mountain" I feel great for a few moments,  but  then look around and see that my support team have gone. Did I do it on my own? I panic. How did I get here? How do I stay on top of this mountain? I then lose my balance and fall back down again. Lost. Without a team. I then start the climb again.
If you have a fitbit and would like to be my friend my profile is.

Cloudy Weather

10 Feb 2014
My Weight: 12st  1lb (76.7kg or 169lbs)

Target Weight: 11st (69.9kg or 154lbs)

I've put on a pound. Woe! I didn't think I went over my daily calorie allowence that often this week. Maybe just haven't been as active this week. I am very lazy after all.
I don't feel as cheerful as I could be. I am slightly worried about dwelling on negitive emotions and trying to find reasons why I feel sad. I am not very good at just excepting sad days. Lets hope the cloud over my head will lift soon. 
If you have a fitbit and would like to be my friend my profile is.
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