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Absence Makes the Waist Grow Wider

So 6 months off from MFP is not a good idea. It's a terrible idea in fact. I took the one major component of my weight loss success and maintenance and I slacked. And where did that get me? 200 lbs. Yep, it needs to be written out (and bolded) because I swore to the high heavens I would NEVER EVER see that number on a scale again (barring pregnancy or something). And now I have. And I HATE IT. I know I did this to myself. Every single lazy and bad choice I made where I could have done better led to this. Every day I skipped logging because I was too lazy to look something up or I just didn't care how many calories went in and out. And now my clothes don't fit, I'm wasting money on new pants, and I feel like sh*t. Honestly, I wake up every morning kicking myself for not doing better and I've let it really get to me. I switched to a new postion at work, let working every other weekend mess up my schedule, and that only made things worse. I was already being lazy and that only gave me yet another excuse.


So, now what? I've admitted I got myself to this point. Now do something about it! I know I have stuff coming up in my life where I don't want me weight holding me back. I'm still dating my boyfriend of 4 1/2 years, so I'm anticipating that progressing to the point where I need to look amazing in a beautiful white dress ;-) Not to mention at other people's life events, the beach, etc... I want to walk up a few flights of stairs and not be winded at the top. I really want my entire closet back!! It's not that every single item of clothing doesn't fit, it's just that I looked 10 times better it all of it. I really want my Lilly Pulitzer dress to fit again!!! Plus I'm wasting a ton of money eating out when I can easily bring lunch or cook a healthy dinner. This past week was slightly weird circumstances (getting snowed into a hotel down the street from work for 2 days so I could get there in the snow storm, the joys of being an essential employee). 


So I need some rules.

- GYM! I have an awesome gym and there's no excuse not to get there. I'm shooting for 4 days a week at a minimum. I have grad class one night a week, so that leaves the other 4 evenings. On the weekends, there must be some activity (getting up and exploring with my bf or walking or helping with condo rehabbing) or an actual workout if I have to work that weekend. My work has a gym, I can go in between satelllite passes to workout for an hour.

- FOOD! The junk nibbling has to stop. I keep buying crap that I nibble on and it just adds up to hundreds of extra calories. From now on it's healthy and filling meals and snacks. MFP logging will keep me in check and make sure I'm getting enough protein in there, otherwise I'll default to bad carbs. 

- STRENGTH! It's been months since I ventured downstairs at my gym to the weights and strength machines. That was definitely a part of my sucess to build up some muscle and endurance. Not just slacking on the Crossramp machine. 

- RUNNING! Ah yes, my nemesis. Even when I was in super awesome shape, I wasn't that great. But it was a workout. And it pushes me like no other kind of exercise can. So I need to hit the treadmill at the gym or the running trail right next to my offie building. I can easily run on the trail on the weekends instead of using the office gym. I might look for a 5K to run in May, although I'd only have 2-ish months to prepare from being really out of shape. I never stopped going to the gym, but my cardio endurance isn't great right now.


So, now that I've laid it all out on the table, I need to stick to it this time. I really can't keep going like this wallowing in my own self loathing. I can get myself out of this, but some things have to change. NOW!

106 votes + -


AggieCass09 wrote 40 months ago:
I'm glad to see you back here but am sorry to see you have gained some weight back. It happens, but you have realized it has happened and you are making great plans to lose it again and keep it off till little babies are in your future! I'm here for support whenever you need it ;)

I've been absent with my blog mostly because i'm struggling with accepting my body post-baby but YOU have motivated me to start blogging again.

Looking forward to following your success, Sara! (congrats on the new role too!)
aippolito1 wrote 40 months ago:
I tried to do a thumbs up but the app freaked out on me so if you have a thumbs down, that's me and it was unintentional lol. So good to have you back, babe!! I'm starting over from over 200 lbs so I feel you on this whole starting over thing. I swore I wouldn't get past 175 then 180 then 200 then 210. Well guess what. I started at 247.5. Now I'm at 221. We CAN do this!! We will do this. We've been successful before!
00trayn wrote 40 months ago:
Awesome job! I've seen your Facebook posts and you're killin it! And I'm super envious that you live in San Diego now, I LOVE that area. I went a few times on business trips. La Jolla beach is my fave area.
a_stronger_me13 wrote 40 months ago:
I swear I could have written this exact same post. I've gotten back into the swing of things this week and it feels great, just have to remember how great it feels and keep at it. You did it once, you can do it again!
runningagainstmyself wrote 40 months ago:
The c25k program gets you to 5k running shape in 8 weeks. Give it a try! You can totally do this!
who4fan wrote 40 months ago:
Good for you! It sounds like you have a great plan in place, go for it!
Angie2316 wrote 40 months ago:
It happens to all of us at some point and by us I mean those that struggle with food :-), I am a foodie at heart. Love to go out to eat and explore different cuisines and boy did my body pay for it in the past. At 19 I reached the weight of 195 and I vowed never to get to that point ever again in my life. It's been a struggle, I'm now 37 but I have managed to keep the weight off and I'm at 151 and trying to get in better shape.

It all starts with food, just try to keep it healthy. Air popped popcorn works for me when I get the potato chip cravings and definitely cooking at home is key. Spinach is my bff, lol and lots and lots of water. At least you realized it now and you are working towards a healthier you. Lots of luck and if you need any kind of recipes, tips, etc...let me know and I will share away :-)
meganjcallaghan wrote 40 months ago:
5k is totally do-able in a few months. Do iiiiiiiit!!!
PonyTailedLoser wrote 40 months ago:
I gotta say, I was very happy to see your user name pop up in the little blog list. I always enjoyed reading your blogs :)
kspec2001 wrote 40 months ago:
its awesome to see when someone is honest with themselves as for why the fell off. and that you are going to be pushing yourself again. I have several friends who want to make changes but are not honest with themselves and are NOT willing to make an effort. cant wait to hear of you slowly reaching your goals
callsitlikeiseeit wrote 40 months ago:
i left once for 2 years and came back with 20 extra pounds. LOLOLOLOL
Laura80111 wrote 40 months ago:
I love your honesty. I was reading your blog back when you were losing and doing so great....and then last June I went on vacation and the next 6 months...well what you wrote could have been me and my words...gained it back and have a closet FULL of cute wonderful clothes that don't fit. I've been toying with losing since January and just this week I've decided I have to get serious if I'm ever going to wear the closet full of wonderfulness. You can do it we are all here cheering you on ;)
MiloBloom83 wrote 40 months ago:
I could have written this also. But the weather appears to have broke and i got on the bike tonight, so hopefully this spells the beginning of Awesome 2.0
00trayn wrote 40 months ago:
Thank you for all the wonderful comments! It's another facet of weight loss that you don't hear about as much. 5 years ago I started the weight loss journey, and little by little I moved away from the healthy mindset and into lazy habits. At one point I went a ENTIRE YEAR without bad fast food (excluding salads or food that fit within my calorie and food goals). Lately it's been something almost every week. I did sign up for a 5K today on June 6th. Lordy help my lungs adapt! LOL!
ashkinb wrote 40 months ago:
Exactly my story - but I let the "will never see 200" creep up to 225 after going back to work last year. Too much travel, too little sleep, all the wrong food, too much wine. Also totally outgrew my closet. Got back to logging daily and pilates / yoga / walking 5 - 6 days/week and I've managed to lose 2 pounds / week these last 7 weeks. 51 pounds to go! Thank you for the inspiration and good luck on that 5K!
barbianneK wrote 40 months ago:
Getting started again after getting off you plan is so hard. I am starting again today. I did well all day now to get through the night without blowing it. I am a big night time eater. My new rule is nothing goes in my mouth unless I log it in. I am also bad at drinking water so I have a 16oz mason jar...seems smaller than a pint glass and chug it every few hours. I have had 6 so far today. Last night I counted on my pre-diet day and it was 2200 calories..Yikes! This morning I reviewed my entries from 5 months ago to see what foods I was eating and how much I was losing. I am done kicking myself in the butt. If first you don't succeed; try try again!
sunnyhlw77 wrote 40 months ago:
At least you're honest! and you're getting back at it! :)
schnoomom wrote 40 months ago:
My story is so close to yours and I just got back on the tracking 12 days ago. I had a streak of over a year and reached my goal weight (actually beat it by 5+pounds) but then I slacked a little here and there and I've gained back just about 20 pounds in the year I let myself slack on tracking all food.

So I'm back with you. Tracking, got this!!
ArtistmanJ wrote 40 months ago:
I hear that! In as little as a few weeks you can lose the feel for what and how much you are eating! You are doing the right thing: nothing in the mouth without putting it down! Last Wednesday, I had a good dinner and then ate everything I could get my hands on... I didn't log it. Bad move!
Adventurekat wrote 40 months ago:
Kudos to you for your bravery in writing about this difficult topic! I had this happen twice in the past few years and vowed to NEVER yo-yo again. I'm using MyFitnessPal to keep myself on a healthy path.

Hang in there, you can do it again!
Kathielee58 wrote 40 months ago:
I could have wrote that, almost word for word, I lost 60lbs. Then I stopped mfp and ever so easily I gained back 20 in about 6 months. I am ready to make the commitment once again. Thank you for getting me motivated again, you inspired me to get up and get moving!!
JRPISBACK wrote 40 months ago:
Writing it down, logging it somewhere is what holds me accountable for my actions and even then I can still cheat. Thanks for the blog! I now know I am not alone in this ever lasting battle! You got this and so do the rest of us!!!
LivingtheLeanDream wrote 40 months ago:
thatta gal!! you can do this :)

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