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TOPIC: How do you adjust expectations to realistic ones?

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October 10, 2012 5:28 AM
I am just starting and have a LOT to lose. I have start out with a really good weight loss the first week. I know this is normally and I will and should drop to a more of a pound a week. But knowing this, I still want to lose 5 -10 lbs a week and can already feel disappointed to see no change or a small change in the morning. I want to shift to a healthy longterm lifestyle not a quick overnight diet that I can not live with forever. BUT I can't seem to get my mind around this and was discouraged this monring. How do you convince yourself to not get caught up in the hipe. I have over a 100 lbs to lose. This is going to take a long time.
  3225873
October 10, 2012 6:06 AM
I also had a great deal of weight to lose when I began in February of this year. The first week I lost 5.5 pounds and thought this is going to be easier than I thought!! After the first couple of weeks, my body began to adjust to the new routine and the weight loss began to slow. The most important thing to remember is that this is not a diet. I was not just trying to lose weight, but to learn how to eat properly and begin an exercise program that I could stick with. Most weeks, I now lose between .5 and 1 pound and that is fine. I have been doing this now for 8 months and have lost a total of 48 pounds and although there are others who have lost over 100 pounds in that time, I do not get discouraged because we are all different and weight loss is unique. Use your friends on MFP, they will be wonderful support for you as you go along. Log every food every day.. Try to get in exercise every day and most important remember this is a life long process. You did not gain the weight overnight and you will not lose it overnight. Stay strong and positive, this is one of the most important changes you can make for yourself!! Good luck, you can do this!!!
October 10, 2012 3:34 PM
It took a long time for the weight to go on and you will not lose (or should not) lose 5-10 pounds a week.

Do it properly, put in all your stats into MFP and just start doing it. I just checked your age thinking you are an impatient teenager, but you are around my age! It can be done, just don't be impatient. I have lost 25 kilograms since Dec 2011, most of it at the beginning.

Good luck, aim for about a pound a week, then you, your body and your brain have time to adjust to the new life you are starting.
  6575081
October 10, 2012 3:37 PM
It is difficult to wait for the pounds to come off. I suggest not weighing everyday because it's easier to see the loss after a week. Hope for 1 to 1.5 pounds a week. I know that doesn't sound like much, but the alternative, is to give up and gain or stay the same. The weight will come off. Maybe set a smaller goal of 10 pounds or 10%, so that you can reach that. Reward yourself (not with food) after you reach that smaller goal. Good luck. I know you can do it!
October 10, 2012 3:39 PM
sounds like you answered your own question
5-10lbs per week is highly unrealistic
October 10, 2012 3:41 PM
When my scale doesn't move I remember how far I've come, I haven't seen this weight in years, and at least it didn't go up!! If you've lost 5, be happy with 5 because it's 5 less that before : ))
  20093173
October 10, 2012 3:43 PM
I set my expectation at losing 1 lb/ week. I might lose more but if I don't expect it then I will get less discouraged. I tend to be one of those people who get discouraged easily. I am also trying to limit how much I weigh myself.
October 10, 2012 3:44 PM
a hundred pounds is possible if you look at it as a years project. You have to celebrate every change, every new size, every month you stuck to it. Reward yourself with new shoes, an ipod shuffle, or a packsack, wii fit..... Focus on the things you have learned and want to learn. Create a blog. I copy and paste storys that inspire me to my blogs. It has been 5 months and I have lost more than 40 pounds, my body is different. But I am only half way to my goal so I can't afford to get side tracked or discouraged. My way is to see this as a 1 year goal. You can do it.
  1210291
October 10, 2012 3:45 PM
You will wake up about 1 year from now with all the extra weight gone and it will feel like it was no time at all. Many people are great at crashing off the weight and discover their skin cannot shrink with the loss. Be careful, lose at a safe rate for your body to adjust and you will be much happier with the results. I still like weighing every day to make sure I am at my target weight. If I am up a pound I am careful the next day. You will get there!
October 10, 2012 3:49 PM
If you don't weigh everyday, and maybe go just once a week instead, it won't feel like such minuscule progress.

That's my 2 cents
October 10, 2012 3:49 PM
Set some interim goals. I started with about 100 pounds to lose. My first goal was to lose about 10, in order to get out of the morbidly obese category. Next it was to get out of the extremely obese category. Now it's to get under 200 pounds (I am less than a pound away right now). Then the next goal is to get to 185, which will take me out of the obese category all together.

Take pictures every month or so. Or even every week or day if you want. You will be able to see changes, even with small losses.

Focus on being healthier right now. That is, don't think about the end goal so much. Eating healthy and exercising will make you a healthier person even before you take the weight off. I often feel now like I am much skinnier than I actually am. I eat healthy, walk everywhere, go to dance class three times a week -- I may not be a skinny person, but I am a healthy person.

I know when you have 100 pounds to lose it can be distressing because, even when you lose 50, you'll still have 50 to go. But now that I've lost 50, I realize that I feel so much lighter and am already so much healthier, that losing that 50 was worth it in and of itself. Even if I don't lose the whole 100, I am better off at 200 than I was at almost 260 (not sure what my top weight was).

The other thing that has helped me is weighing every day and recording and graphing my weight. It helps because even though my weight fluctuates every day (yours will to), I can see the trend on the graph going down.

Patience is important if you are going to lose weight in a healthy way and keep it off long term. You can do it though. Check out some of the success stories on this site. You may not be able to join them tomorrow, but you will eventually if you are willing to take the time and put in the effort. Good luck!
October 10, 2012 3:51 PM
Stop obsessing about losing weight and start obsessing about being healthy. Eat clean, drink clean, and live clean with plenty of exercise. The weight is just a very nice side effect of healthy living.

That's how I've learned to work my way through this VERY long process of losing all the weight I put on. Not every meal is perfect and the weight isn't coming off 10lbs a week but the scale keeps moving and I can live with this way of eating for the rest of my life.
  14856563
October 10, 2012 3:51 PM
Set short term goals for yourself and use measurements and pictures. pictures actually speak louder than anything else you can do!

I set goals as 5%, 10%, obest --> overweight, under 200#, etc... smaller goals are easier to accomplish than "over 100 pounds to lose"...
  9513204
October 10, 2012 3:52 PM
I had to think of it as my life. I either lose weight and get my blood sugar under control....or get heavier, sicker and suffer the complications of diabetes....heart problems, possible strokes, losing a foot or limb, etc. You may not have diabetes but there are other health problems that would most certainly affect you..heart attacks, joint problems, high blood pressure, etc.

The last time I lost weight, I was impatient too. I lost 40 pounds in 2 months. Now I haven't lost that much in FOUR months. That tells me I am doing it right this time. Do I wish I had done this years ago so I would be done now? SURE! But I didn't. But now I figure I have about 8 months to go to get to my final goal. My program has become a habit....I wake up every morning knowing what I have to do and then do it.

You are doing great so far! Keep it up and it will become a habit with you, too. That's not to say you wont have bad days....we all do. But you focus on the good days and put the bad ones behind you. You CAN do it! Continued success!!
  23159244
October 10, 2012 3:54 PM
Slow and steady wins the race. I find the same applies to saving money: if I try to save too much too fast, I run out of money and have to dip into savings and my balance actually drops. If I save at a slow and steady pace, even if it's not fun to watch, the dollars rising rapidly, I don't have to dip into savings and a year later, notice that I've actually saved a lot.
  15006326
October 10, 2012 3:54 PM
Honestly, i am having the same issues.
i have super strong motivation for a week, get all pumped about working out, eating better, then... the next week, im so over it. i really dont know why i am like this! but its really frustrating that i cant stick with anything!!
good luck to you, i hope this website at least helps you :)
October 10, 2012 3:59 PM
Try setting goals that aren't centered on the scale. All the scale knows is the effect of gravity on your body. It has no clue what the composition of that mass is. It could be muscle, water, fat, it any variation of combinations. Put the scale away and only measure at prescribed intervals... weekly, every other week. Any more than that and you can drive yourself nuts.

Goals you can measure that show you are getting fit don't have to have your weight attached to them. Allow yourself to make them into statements:

I logged 8 glasses of water every day for X number of days!
I stayed within my calorie goal for X number of days!
Last week I walked one mile and it took me 20 minutes, this week I did it in 19!
I pushed X poundsof weight around in the gym today! (My personal favorite!)
I walked/ran X laps around the block without stopping!
I rode a 5K on my bike!
I played tag with my kids today!
I had a great time doing X!

Look at the accomplishments, not the losses, and let that scale know it isn't boss, it's just another form of measurement, and by far, the least important!
  6407516
October 10, 2012 4:04 PM
You have to change your mindset, think if you would have started this day last year and set your goals to only 2 lbs per week, you would be at goal today. Also the lower you set your weekly goal the more calories you can consume which will be easier to stick with long term. Also realize when you are losing weight you progressively look and feel better, you don't have to wait till you reach goal before you start seeing positive changes, they start much sooner. Enjoy the process so it does last long term.
October 10, 2012 4:04 PM
I've been feeling the same way. Almost shed a few tears over it today...but I'm still doing the best I can every day to get more and more healthy.

Keep your chin up. We can do this...together! :)
October 10, 2012 4:05 PM
QUOTE:

I am just starting and have a LOT to lose. I have start out with a really good weight loss the first week. I know this is normally and I will and should drop to a more of a pound a week. But knowing this, I still want to lose 5 -10 lbs a week and can already feel disappointed to see no change or a small change in the morning. I want to shift to a healthy longterm lifestyle not a quick overnight diet that I can not live with forever. BUT I can't seem to get my mind around this and was discouraged this monring. How do you convince yourself to not get caught up in the hipe. I have over a 100 lbs to lose. This is going to take a long time.

It does take a while.
The great things to focus on are, not the scale number, but on all the reasons why you want the scale to move.
Those reasons would be...
Freedom from bad habits,
A fun future
Better skin
Feeling energetic
Strength
Joy and enthusiasm
Creativity
Beauty
Vitality and health
Having fun
And on and on and on.....
The list is yours to make.
Each day, focus on how you can move forward in one or more of these areas, always staying positive.
Never trash yourself for not performing perfectly...and Always watch for the ways you improve.

You'll learn something new everyday, as you give yourself to improvement.

There is so much to rejoice over all along the way! Focus on those things!
  21820225
October 10, 2012 4:14 PM
It's hard to be patient. I am the same way. But I know for a fact that there is no healthy way to lose 5-10 lbs a week. My first week i lost 7 and I think it was mostly water weight. The second week I lost 3lbs. You are supposed to lose no more than 2lbs a week to be healthy. It is going to take awhile but you will get there! And each day you are done, you are another day closer! I have over 100lbs to lose so you and I are in the same boat!
  29930977
October 10, 2012 4:15 PM
I agree with many others. This is not a DIET. It is a life style change. Ive lost 49lb and am on a stand still. 3 weeks now. However, I know I will break throuh it and will loose the rest of my weight, and be healthy. The way I stay with realistic expectations, is admit, this is a life style change not a diet. I dont think this will help you, but it helps me... Just reminding myself that Its not a temp. thing. To be honest I would be worried if I lost 10 lbs a week. (wow wouldnt that be great to make my goal in only 10 weeks) I took much loner than that to gain it
Edited by KeriW626 On October 10, 2012 4:17 PM
  23291798
October 10, 2012 4:27 PM
QUOTE:

Stop obsessing about losing weight and start obsessing about being healthy. Eat clean, drink clean, and live clean with plenty of exercise. The weight is just a very nice side effect of healthy living.

See above quote.....Initially weight will 'fall off' quickly in folks that have a lot to lose. Don't obsess with the number on the scale. Try to log EVERYTHING and it will help you slowly but surely to learn to a) control portions b) make better food choices and remind you to drink water. Try to make changes to your food choices....if fast food, take out and processed food are your personal food choices try to swap items out for more and more home-made, fresh and less processed choices. Cut down on soda and juices if that is a problem area. Set your macros to get enough protein to make you feel satiated. Don't weigh yourself daily. Once a week or once every other week should be enough. Take starting pic for comparison later, it seems to motivate folks that don't seem to see changes when they look in the mirror.......And take (and track) measurements.....you may notice loss in inches and looser fitting clothes at times more that changes on the scale. And above all remember......it took a long time to gain all this extra weight, it will take time and effort to get it off. But once you make some changes to your lifestyle (hopefully permament) you will see results. And don't quit....good days, bad days....log and learn smile
  4726576
October 10, 2012 4:44 PM
Take your measurements now, so that you've got another metric (other than the scale) to show your progress. Another thing to do is to go through your closet and find some clothes that are presently too tight and check them in a month and see if you can fit into them. Again, you can change your shape without losing weight, but if you just focus on the number on the scale, you can get disappointed.

I weigh every day (people have varying opinions on whether that's the way to go or not), but for me it works. However, having been doing this for 8 months, I know that there can be wild fluctuations from day to day and to not get discouraged. For whatever reason, I find my weight basically stays flat for 5-6 days, then a pound falls off, then start all over again. Do whatever is going to motivate you without getting you obsessed. Good luck!!!
  16759922
October 10, 2012 4:46 PM
http://www.losertown.org/eats/cal.php
I am very impatient, feeling frustrated that I am doing so well staying on track but I'll have to wait a while before I'm at my goal. The site I pasted above can be a huge help to keep my goals realistic. You enter your stats, how many calories you plan to eat, and how much you plan to exercise, and it will tell you what you can expect to weigh each week. It can help you keep a realistic outlook.
  30253740

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