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TOPIC: I am a woman who cries about everything

 
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August 11, 2012 5:18 AM
I am a woman who cries about everything. By everything I mean when I'm mad, when I'm sad, when I'm happy. I hate this about myself. The only "advice" I've ever been given is "go to the doctor and get a pill." I have no desire to take unnecessary medication. I don't want my emotions to stop. I want a coping mechanism that I can use when I can't stop crying. The only solution I have found so far is sleep. After a goodnight's sleep, the tears are almost always gone.

I guess my question is, Are you a "crier" and how do you make yourself stop?
August 11, 2012 5:20 AM
There is nothing wrong with taking a pill if you need. I take anxiety meds. Not all the time but when I need to. Hormones and evil menopause cause my issues.

It's not unnecessary medication if you need it.
August 11, 2012 5:26 AM
I'd be curious to know what's at the root of all of the crying? Is it a feeling of being overwhelmed? Are there areas of your life that are kind of out of control and aren't being dealt with? Feeling your emotions is a good thing, I think, but not being able to hold back the tears for everything suggests to me that there's something bigger at play.
  21339219
August 11, 2012 5:27 AM
Funny enough, I was having mood issues and went to see the Dr. Instead of giving me something for anxiety/depression, I was diagnosed with a sleeping disorder. From what I understand it is very common.
August 11, 2012 5:28 AM
What do you take? When I've asked the doctor about an occaional pill, she said it doesn't work that way. I have to take an everyday pill to maintain. My problem with that is my crying spells aren't everyday though are mostly during TOM and after I have found I am absorbing my daughter's emotions during her TOM.
August 11, 2012 5:30 AM
Yep I am a crier and I do absolutely nothing about it. They cannot give you a pill to magically balance your hormones and thats most typically what makes women cry. It's not an emotional issue or even a brain chemistry issue. Not when you cry no matter what mood you are in anyway. I mean if you were catatonically depressed all the time then it would be depression, a mood disorder with brain chemistry issues.

The only bad thing about being a weepy mess at any emotion is the embarassment factor but eh, you get over that part eventually. LOL
  5721177
August 11, 2012 5:31 AM
The number one reason I cry that I hate is when I get stressed. It's not just a little cry when I start crying, I can not control for it the rest of the day. It could be anything - a fight with a boyfriend, a coworker be snarky, etc...
August 11, 2012 5:32 AM
I definitely am a crier too. I hate it but whenever I get upset about something, mad, embarrassed, etc the tears start coming and I can't control it. I guess it's how my body expresses my emotions and I hate it but I guess there's nothing I can do about it :/
August 11, 2012 5:33 AM
You didn't give any context... by happy, do you mean when you're husband proposed or your child won an important award; by mad, do you mean when your husband cheated on you or your house was robbed; by sad, do you mean when you lost a beloved pet? Those would all be appropriate situations for crying - and often times a good cry (for whatever reason) is cathartic...

But if you cry because the waiter forgot you wanted the dressing on the side or because someone complimented you or because you broke your favorite coffee mug --- that is completely out of proportion to the situation. I am not judging - I've been in this second group. I got the help I needed - and it includes some very necessary meditation.

You say you hate this about yourself... that reaction alone isn't healthy. I hope you find someone you can talk to - a professional - and dig a little into what's tripping your sob response... It is scary, but SO worth it...

Edt: while I was typing my response, several others were posted - and I have to say that it concerns me that people think they just are the way they are and there is nothing that can be done. That is baloney - and we're all on this site to change things about ourselves that a lot of people just accept - our weight & health. If it's causing you pain or trouble - DEAL with it! You can find a better way...
Edited by BSchoberg On August 11, 2012 5:38 AM
  24122556
August 11, 2012 5:34 AM
I cry all the time too. And I don't make myself stop. Yes, it can be embarrassing, but it's just a part of me. The more comfortable I am in a given situation, the less likely I am to cry, so stressing about my crying is counterproductive.
August 11, 2012 5:38 AM
When I was going through a very stressful time with a family member passing and high-stress job, my Dr. prescribed Buspar (also known as Buspirone in generic form). It had hardly any side-effects (biggest was some temporary dizziness shortly after taking it for about 10 mins, but nothing that wasn't manageable). It didn't make me feel drugged or different, except the anxiety was gone which helped me actually cope with what was happening. It might be good to ask your Dr. if it would work for you. You can feel better, and it is so worth it! Good luck.
  26966839
August 11, 2012 5:38 AM
A few weeks ago I was crazy mad about something (don't even remember what now) and instead of stewing on it and getting myself worked up I hopped on the treadmill and had a good little run. I felt great after. I definitely think the endorphins from exercise are a better choice than a pill in most cases. And yes, I'm a crier but not like I used to be before I changed my lifestyle and started feeling better about myself and life in general.
  22001998
August 11, 2012 5:41 AM
Since you mentioned it happens pretty much only around your TOM (or around your daughter's TOM, which suggests you're an empath), I think that's the key to helping you right there. For me, my TOM usually causes me to have one day where I overreact to EVERYTHING - not so much crying in my case, but kind of going mentally obsessive/psycho over things, which is soooooo not how I usually react. When I find myself noting that I'm overreacting to something, I stop myself, take a deep breath, consult the calendar to see if I'm anywhere close to my expected TOM, and when I see that I am (as is true in about 99.99% of the times this has happened), I'll force myself to set aside whatever the issue is that's upsetting me. If it's an issue WORTHY of me being upset, it'll still be there for me to freak out about tomorrow, right? Chances are, though, when tomorrow comes (after a night of sleep as you noted), I'll realize that the issue is not a big deal at all, and I'll be proud of myself for averting disaster the day before.

When you find yourself getting super emotional, could you try a similar approach, and stop, analyze if this is just "one of those days", and if so, mentally separate yourself from the issue for a day?
  21339219
August 11, 2012 5:44 AM
QUOTE:

I am a woman who cries about everything. By everything I mean when I'm mad, when I'm sad, when I'm happy. I hate this about myself. The only "advice" I've ever been given is "go to the doctor and get a pill." I have no desire to take unnecessary medication. I don't want my emotions to stop. I want a coping mechanism that I can use when I can't stop crying. The only solution I have found so far is sleep. After a goodnight's sleep, the tears are almost always gone.

I guess my question is, Are you a "crier" and how do you make yourself stop?


If its not doing anything to health and only now and then I wouldn't take anything for it. Sometimes crying can be the body's best way to fight against stress. As another poster pointed out, sleep deprivation might be causing you to get stressed or overwhelmed easier then what you should be. Maybe keep track of emotions with your sleep patterns for a bit to see if that can be causing the problems.
August 11, 2012 5:48 AM
...this may not help but you never know....I tend to cry easily (though admittedly, not too often). Many years ago, I heard a phrase that helps me keep my crying under control. Mostly in emotional situations though, like hearing bad news about a loved one or friend....."accept it with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child" --It helps me keep things in check and makes me pull up my pants and act like the grownup I am. Good luck!
August 11, 2012 5:56 AM
Have you considered therapy? there is nothing wrong with crying but it seems like it has become a bit extreme for you. You don't have to take a pill but it would probably benefit you to learn how to regulate your emotions. Therapy helped me to learn how to do this.
  24458877
August 11, 2012 6:12 AM
I don't cry about EVERYTHING but I do cry when my feeling are hurt, i'm mad, sad or frustrated, I just sit down and have a good cry. The alternative is to be angry, but that's no good either. Just hopefully you have someone to turn to that can make you feel better.
  18141851

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