July 2nd Rant of the Day:

Stress relief is a big part of weight loss. So instead of reaching for a doughnut to deal with stress they say that when you're frustrated it's helpful to write a letter to the person or about a situation even if you never plan on giving it to them. So here's mine for today....Please join in and get that weight off your shoulders!!!

Dear lady in the blue VW that made me late for work today,

Hi again, it's me. The person in the Black Honda Civic that had to follow you for 20 minutes this morning until you finally pulled off at Starbucks. Are you still on your cell phone?? I'm assuming it was a very exciting conversation seeing as you swerved off the road at one point nearly hitting a parked car. Perhaps you were talking to someone at the DMV to check if in fact it is okay to drive 10 mph under the speed limit while chatting on the phone and having your turn signal continually on "just in case" you happen to ever turn. Did I mention that I saw that cup of coffee you were holding in the other hand when I passed you. I'm guessing the DMV thinks it okay to drive with a couple of fingers on the wheel, too? It sure is nice to know that drivers like you are there to help drivers like me practice patience. Here's to hoping I never see you on the road again

Ok, that was funny. Thank you!! Hehe. Ok, my turn....

Dear girl at the office who wouldn't stop complaining about her ankle,

From the moment you walked (fake limped) in the door, you haven't stopped talking about the pain you're in. You've been on your cellphone telling anyone who will listen that you may need an x-ray. When I asked if it was swollen or if you iced it after you fell, you replied by saying you took a nap. That is not the question I asked. When you showed it to me, revealing no swelling or bruising, I'm not sorry for telling you to walk it off. I once had such a bad sprain that the doctor told me that I'd have been better off if I just broke it. So, if you mention your ankle one more time, I might kick you in it, giving you a real reason to get an x-ray.

Aaahhh... I feel better.... Thanks bla115

Dear ANYONE that talks on their cell phones and drives...worse yet, texts and drives,

You are clearly incapable of walking and chewing gum at the same time, the proof is in your ability to drive while holding your phone up to one ear that makes it impossible for you to clearly check your blind spots before swerving into an occupied lane. Additional proof is in your inability to drive anywhere near the speed limit, usually you hold up smooth flowing traffic by going at least 10 miles UNDER the speed limit.

Please be aware that while it might be nice to talk to someone while driving, it is also nice to have a few moments of peace and quiet but perhaps you are uncomfortable being alone and having a little alone time and PAYING ATTENTION to what you are doing and how you are single handedly making bla115 late for work!

Thanks for being the idiot we can all vent about! I guess you truly do serve a purpose in this life
Nich0le

Whenever I see someone driving while on their cell, I want to yell "Hang up and drive!!!"

Dear crooks who stole my money,
How DARE you take money from my account? Who are you? What were you planning on sending me? When was it gonna get here?
How can you take from someone who has no job, and needs her funds to last as long as possible? How on earth did you even manage to get my account info? Is that even legal?? Gimme my money back, or I'll kick you in the shins!
Signed,
Fed up!

Dear make up counter girl!

I know your conversation about your deadbeat boyfriend was the most important thing in the world, but making me wait through every stupid detail of your pathetic relationship was just , how should I say it, AGONIZING! You are there in your crappy minimum wage job to sell cosmetics, not jaw jack with your other loser make up counter girlfriend. Go back to school and make something of yourself, or shut up and sell me my darn lipstick! I don't want to hear about your jerk boyfriend that you were stupid enough to buy a new set of rims for!

Thanks, the perturbed redhead who did not get her lipstick without the torture of your pathetic life being the focus of the day!


Thank you for that I feel better already!

Dear customers at my restaurant who only left me a 10% tip on your $130 tab,

You guzzled Dr. Pepper like you were going to the electric chair, and you changed up your order to something I was nice enough to have the kitchen make even though it's not even on the menu, and your kid throws crap all over the floor and so do you! Your friends showed up late and you sat out on the patio where it's literally 100 degrees...and you leave me a lousy 10% tip. Thanks for nothing except for keeping the stereotype alive.

Dear customers at my restaurant who left your five kids in my station while you sat across the restaurant enjoying yourself,

I am not a babysitter! You're annoyed that we were so busy and you had to be split even even though you 'dine here twice a week'? Well how about picking up the phone and making an effing reservation for the NINE of you! Novel idea, I know! We just came up with that, try it next time! And you know what else? You don't dine here twice a week...I work six nights a week and have never seen you before in my life...so bite me.

And last but not least?

Dear Women who take up my two tables for hours at a time after you've paid out just so you can sit and BS,

Time is money. The longer you sit there the fewer tables I have so the less money I make. What can you possible talk about that requires you to sit for HOURS and go on and on and effing on?! You see the place is jam packed, you are more than welcome to sit outside and gab all you want. Or better yet, go home and do that! If you are still ordering, or if you tip me appropriately for taking my tables for hours, that's perfectly fine...I'd like that a lot! And why can you not just all pay with one credit card instead of 17 separate checks, or all bring cash? And why are women so stingy? "No, Sally, you got the salad that was $7, not the $6 one, you need to pitch in an extra dollar. And Lucy, your Cosmo was $6.75, not $6.50..."


Whew, I feel better. I enjoy my job, I really do...but tonight was a rough night.

bump...

Dear customer service hotline that no one answers,

I hope you have some way of knowing that I called you today. I didn't expect to get a live person as it is a holiday but a listing of your business hours would have been nice. Of course you had to play with my emotions by dangling a "if this is an emergency" please call this number, which I did, and guess what?? No one answered! Now I'm not sure what constitutes a customer service emergency but I guess I'll never find out since no one answered! Here's my question...How can you screen an emergency number line?!? Wouldn't that be the very line that you would be sure to have someone pick up?? I suppose when you want something from me in the future, (like you did on tuesday) I'll direct you to my "emergency line".

I have rant

Dear Drivers of cars

I work in garage where you park your big amerikan cars. I not like the sound tires make when you turn corners. It not hurt ears but it not good sound. It make sqeel sound all day.

As a former waitress, I totally sympathize

It's tough. Thank God nights like those are few and far between!

I used to be a server, I once chased a customer out of the place to give them their tip back screaming "you left your money on the table" so his friends could see how cheap he was. That felt really good.

What the declaration cost this country! :

Subject: 4th of July

Have you ever wondered what happened to the 56 men who signed the
Declaration of Independence?

Five signers were captured by the British as traitors,
and tortured before they died.

Twelve had their homes ransacked and burned.
Two lost their sons serving in the Revolutionary Army;
another had two sons captured.

Nine of the 56 fought and died from wounds or
hardships of the Revolutionary War.

They signed and they pledged their lives, their fortunes,
and their sacred honor.

What kind of men were they?

Twenty-four were lawyers and jurists.
Eleven were merchants,
nine were farmers and large plantation owners;
men of means, well educated,
but they signed the Declaration of Independence
knowing full well that the penalty would be death if
they were captured.


Carter Braxton of Virginia, a wealthy planter and
trader, saw his ships swept from the seas by the
British Navy. He sold his home and properties to
pay his debts, and died in rags.

Thomas McKeam was so hounded by the British
that he was forced to move his family almost constantly.
He served in the Congress without pay, and his family
was kept in hiding. His possessions were taken from him,
and poverty was his reward.

Vandals or soldiers looted the properties of Dillery, Hall, Clymer,
Walton, Gwinnett, Heyward, Ruttledge, and Middleton.

At the battle of Yorktown, Thomas Nelson, Jr., noted that
the British General Cornwallis had taken over the Nelson
home for his headquarters. He quietly urged General
George Washington to open fire. The home was destroyed,
and Nelson died bankrupt.

Francis Lewis had his home and properties destroyed.
The enemy jailed his wife, and she died within a few months.

John Hart was driven from his wife's bedside as she was dying.
Their 13 children fled for their lives. His fields and his gristmill
were laid to waste. For more than a year he lived in forests
and caves, returning home to find his wife dead and his
children vanished.


So, take a few minutes while enjoying your 4th of July holiday and
silently thank these patriots. It's not much to ask for the price
they paid.

I wish I could do that but I'd get fired. It's okay, I have my own little ways of taking care of things...and I never forget a face.

How could you get fired for returning lost money? It is all in how you say it, isn't it! "Sir, oh Sir, you left your money on the table I am so glad I caught you!" Then Smile as you hold up the cheap tip for all to see!

Like you, I have a perfect knack for saying things the right way...it gets my point across and I won't get in trouble. 'Thank you SO MUCH for your GENEROSITY! So nice of you!" All said with a fake smile, of course. How can I get in trouble for saying thank you?