So for the last year and a half or so I have been on Lexapro (due to a horrible divorce, and the realization that my ex-wife was...well...let's just say she's a poor person). I have never been someone who has really taken medicines as I don't like the feeling of being medicated in any way. After a couple of close calls though (I admit it, I was, for the first time in my life suicidal...I didn't make any attempts, but I came close...it's kinda surreal looking back on it) my doctor recommended me going on it for depression and anxiety. So, I did. It worked wonders, it was great, and I credit it for helping me refocus and cut through the crap that was crippling me.

So after one unsuccessful attempt to come off it (it was far too soon, and my divorce wasn't final yet) I have decided that it's time to get back to business as usual without chemical assistance.

I have spent the last 3 or so months weening myself from 20mg and have eventually made my way to 5mg every other day. 4 days ago, after talking with Manda (she's my rock) I made the decision to stop taking it. The first day, I felt ok, the next day my hands started hurting (felt hypersensitive, like little shocks going through them), the second day the shocks became worse, and my legs started having them also, yesterday I developed chills and the pain has moved into my arms...today...well today it is pretty rough...the pain is fairly intense and my whole body is aching...I am tired and completely drained...the chills are also really bad today and my whole body is trembling...I am light headed and I am starting to feel slightly nauceous...I have seen a lot of addicts come off dope, but I've never experienced withdrawals myself, in any way shape or form....it's extremely hard...but I can't let myself go back on it...I have to power through it and keep in mind that the old me is the goal. I deserve it and Manda deserves it. This is kinda the wage I am paying for being so weak in the first place.

Anyway, from what I've read, it's about a 2 week process to beat the withdrawals....I'm trying not to become irritable, but my tolerance for people is at a low right now...

Please just say a prayer for me on this. I don't like to complain, (I never tell people when I am hurting) but this is a little too much to bear alone. I love and trust you guys, so I thought I would vent your way a little. Thanks for being here during a difficult time for me. (and say a prayer for Manda too, she's been so good to me the last couple of days, she's definately my angel...)

Love you all

-J

J--

Prayers are always available!

I commend you for having courage to seek help when you needed it--and also for now trying to get off meds. I didn't realize one could have those kinds of withdrawals from depression meds, and I hope that you soon beat this stuff.

I'm so glad that Manda is there with you through this--God has looked after you!

Keep your chin up and your hands folded in prayer, and you'll get the strength you need from the only Rock that can provide it!

You will get through this J. It's for your well being. It's time to take your life back. GOD is there for you honey. Ask for his help... ask for his strength.. he is always there... You will get through this. I know you will. One day at a time sweetie.

u

~Jo Jo

You and Manda are in my prayers.


And J - try not to think of this as a punishment for "being weak in the first place" - you went through a lot and yes, sometimes we all need help in one form or another, and that's perfectly okay. You WILL get through this, and the blessing at the end is that you will never take for granted a happy, healthy life.

Even though you don't know me, I hope it helps to know that people care. Love and hugs to you both.

First off - you aren't "weak in the first place", you are human and Gods creation. Have faith, He will see you through.
Second-Manda, more power to you girl for being the rock in the storm! You too will get through this.
Third-WAY TO GO on having the fortitude to make this happen, YOU CAN DO IT!

J -

I certainly don't believe you were 'weak' before and asking for support is certainly not complaining. Unfortunately, sometimes life just happens. I give you alot of credit for doing this this. Manda was a gift to you - and you will get through this together.

Prayers your way -
Lynn

I love you honey.

We'll make it through this.

I think you are very strong and brave to talk about your problems. Sometimes that is the hardest thing; asking for help. I have taken antidepressents several time in my adult life. I also tried to weene myself off and it was very dangerous. I thought I shouldn't need medication to make me feel better. I had a similar reaction to you, but i also was dizzy and my body was in shock, so just be careful. My aunt told me once that if I broke my arm or had the flu I wouldn't think twice about taking medicine to help. So if it is helping you through this hard time then that is what its job is. Hang in there. My prayers are with you.

j~
You can do it! I've been there! (with other meds) and trust me it is HARD but once you do it it feels SO SO SO good! It's just like weight loss, sometimes it's hard to focus, but you've gotta keep your eyes on the prize. Also, have you talked to your doctor? For some meds there are different ways to withdraw and different tips and things you can do to make it easier on your body. i quit cold turkey without talking to my doctor, after weaning myself down to a smaller dose, and trust me he was NOT happy with me but in the long run it was like I needed to PROVE to myself that I could do it. Just take it one day at a time, one hour at a time if you have to. Just try to stay busy and think about other stuff, and if you ened us, we are here for you for sure!!!!!

jill

J,

Please don't ever think that you were "weak in the first place". Seeking help from your doctor was a sign of strength. Divorce is so hard... no matter what the situation is like. Sometimes asking for help is the hardest and the bravest thing to do. Good luck to you... You WILL get through this.

My hat is off to you J! God is on your side and you will make it through this....
Just remember, pain is weakness leaving the body! The strong you is waiting on the other side!
I'm cheering for you!
Kelly

Hi there,

You are not weak, somtimes life throws us curves that are difficult to handle, and since we are not perfect it makes perfect sence sometimes to have to take something to help us out. I was going through withdrawal from zoloft and also from anxiety pills. Unlike you I didn't go through any physical pain but alot of head tricks. I almost ALMOST lost my husband, because I didn't know how to talk to him about what was going on, so in turn he didn't know how to deal with it. At least you have that on your side! In my case the antidepressants were what was actually making me suicidal, so there was no choice. I can totally understand you wanting to get off of them. My husband was the reason I knew I could do it, and my reason for wanting to do it too! I still have "down" times but they are much more manageable, and now when I am having a bout of depression, I write, or talk to my husband about it, take long walks and this helps ten times more than the meds ever did!

Give your pain up to God and Manda, they are both strong enough and willing to be your crutch!! It will be hard, but totally worth it....hang in there. I will pray for strength for you both, and know you will be well soon!!

Thoughts and prayers!

Penny

I am sorry you have to go through this!! but you have a great girl by your side and you have all of us here...... you can do it!!!

jackie

Definitely talk to your doctor about the side effects you're having!! Just as different people metabolize drugs at different rates, they withdraw from them differently too. Certain antidepressants and anxiety meds can have dangerous effects if you don't taper off of them correctly and in a way that works with your own body.

Also, taking antidepressants or having depression does not mean a person is weak. These things can happen to anyone. Weakness is not having the courage to ask for help when you need it, and you are showing that courage right now.

I have to second this. . .this sounds like a question for the Dr. Just to make sure it's normal withdrawal symptoms and not something dangerous.

Breathe and pray.

aww J, my heart is with you.

you are strong and will power through! im glad you have a rock to help steady you away from the lexapro...im with you on the nonmedicated side of life! im proud of you for that!!!!

You will tough it out. I have a feeling you are strong and will come through fine. Keep struggling and think of how much better it will be when you can feel better on your own without any medical help. If you look at my sight, you will see why doctors tried to put me on some stuff for a while, but I had so much going on, it would have been even harder with that and I stopped after two weeks on my own. Glad I did now. I am just fine and feel great, and that is saying something!
Good luck to you!

thank you for having the courage to share this very personal story with all of us. It shows your level of trust and more importantly, your strength to fight through this difficult time. you are obviously ready, let your higher power guide you - best wishes!

My thoughts and prayers are with you. You are so lucky to have found a soulmate in Manda - best to both of you. We love you!

tricia

I so admire your strength to do this!!! You will make it through - and you are so lucky to have Manda's support.

Take good care of each other...

It took alot of courage to share that story with us. Don't ever think your "weak"!! There are times in all our lives that we need help. Your doing the absolute right thing....you are using or used the meds for what you needed them for and now that you feel stronger, your giving them up and moving on with your life. We're all here for you to "vent" to online....Manda's there to hold you and God is there watching over you. I'm praying that he calm your symptoms and clean your body completely so you feel better and whole as soon as possible.

And as previously stated, you certainly want to talk w/the doc who prescribed them......I hear cold turkey can be VERY difficult on the body, you just want to be sure your under the doc's care as you go completely off them.

Hugs and Prayers,

~Melanie~

SARGE!!!

I'm so glad you have Manda.

You can beat this bro. You have my prayers. (Manda too )

Fellow Lexapro taker here...I have heard that withdrawal symptoms are "flu-like", but had no idea they were so severe!

I am so sorry that you are going through such unpleasantness. It sounds like you were responsibly tapering off too...so I too, would suggest mentioning the withdrawal symptoms to you doctor...just to make sure everything is going as it should. In the meantime...I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Glad you've got Manda there to help you through!

Sorry you both have to go through this. I will be thinking of you both and sending good vibes your way.


Hey wasn't there a Star Trek kinda like this?

prayers your way -- you will get through this. <2weeks to go (easier said then done)

I'm sorry you have to go through all this. Obviously you feel as if you can live without that medication and the fact how severe the withdrawal is also shows you what it really does to your body. I myself hate being dependent on medication, I only take BP medicine.

You are both in my prayers and I hope you make it through these rough times well.