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TOPIC: Depressed about my body

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August 10, 2014 1:55 AM
Just been to the gym and I took a photo afterwards.
<---This is said photo. It's properly put me on a downer. Why won't my muscles grow like the other guys on here?
August 10, 2014 2:04 AM
I feel the same, but a good friend gave me the following advice:

Its your body not theirs, you have no idea what they do each day, they might be spending 12 hours a day in the gym or been training for 5+ years.
Just be happy with what you have and what you are gaining.

A year ago, you would have looked at people with your current body shape and wondered why you can't look like that
  30442978
August 10, 2014 2:05 AM
Troll much?
August 10, 2014 2:08 AM
QUOTE:

Troll much?


No. Just devoid of any self-esteem and completely disillusioned. Thanks for your help, though.
August 10, 2014 2:16 AM
Looking at your diary, you are most likely not in enough surplus, basic rule of thumb is a 500 calorie surplus, I seriously doubt your maintenance intake is 1800-1900 calories. I would also drop your protein to 0.8 to 1 gram per pound of lean body mass, 260 grams would sustain Jay Cutler, you would be more than fine at 200 grams, your fats are fine, the rest would be carbohydrates. You cannot grow without a surplus of calories, and trying to lean bulk at just above maintenance takes the knowledge of a mad scientist as you could very well over exert yourself and end up in a deficit.

Make sure you track your progression or total volume (weightxrepsxsets) and be sure to increase it over time, working to failure is not always the key as you will decrease the total volume by falling short on remaining sets, save working to failure for your last set or two of an exercise to keep your volume at its highest.

But you look like you are coming along just fine, keep up the good work.
Edited by kessler4130 On August 10, 2014 2:18 AM
  48823354
August 10, 2014 2:22 AM
You're looking pretty good to me flowerforyou
August 10, 2014 2:28 AM
It takes time and patience to eventually get there.
No one ever got to the physique they have without time and efforts.
Eat big - train big and make sure you give 110% in the weight area - all the good stuff will eventually show up!
August 10, 2014 2:31 AM
QUOTE:

Looking at your diary, you are most likely not in enough surplus, basic rule of thumb is a 500 calorie surplus, I seriously doubt your maintenance intake is 1800-1900 calories. I would also drop your protein to 0.8 to 1 gram per pound of lean body mass, 260 grams would sustain Jay Cutler, you would be more than fine at 200 grams, your fats are fine, the rest would be carbohydrates. You cannot grow without a surplus of calories, and trying to lean bulk at just above maintenance takes the knowledge of a mad scientist as you could very well over exert yourself and end up in a deficit.

Make sure you track your progression or total volume (weightxrepsxsets) and be sure to increase it over time, working to failure is not always the key as you will decrease the total volume by falling short on remaining sets, save working to failure for your last set or two of an exercise to keep your volume at its highest.

But you look like you are coming along just fine, keep up the good work.


Thank you. Appreciated.
August 10, 2014 7:02 PM
When you say "other guys" who are you talking about? Like ifbb pro bodybuilders, guys at your gym, people here on mfp?
  31020562
August 10, 2014 7:10 PM
Just a thought, but does it get harder with age?
Regardless, you look fantastic, I think, and if you're working hard you'll get where you need to go.
  54522022
August 10, 2014 7:13 PM
Dude, your physique is way above average in terms of attractiveness and fitness as compared to the world's average 40 year old.

So what's the problem?

And what the hell is going on here with the threads tonight?

A 39 year old is worried about his girly friend shunning his moobs (which appear to be non existent in his photo) and a 40 year old is depressed about not looking like Jean Claude Van Damme circa 1985.
August 10, 2014 7:17 PM
QUOTE:

QUOTE:

Troll much?


No. Just devoid of any self-esteem and completely disillusioned. Thanks for your help, though.


Aw :( *hugs*
August 10, 2014 7:23 PM
QUOTE:

Dude, your physique is way above average in terms of attractiveness and fitness as compared to the world's average 40 year old.

So what's the problem?

And what the hell is going on here with the threads tonight?

A 39 year old is worried about his girly friend shunning his moobs (which appear to be non existent in his photo) and a 40 year old is depressed about not looking like Jean Claude Van Damme circa 1985.


Its the pull of the Super Moon tonight. It must be messing with our minds. wink laugh
  57524833
August 10, 2014 7:48 PM
I think you look terrific. You have made great progress and your work and dedication has paid off. But, truth be told, I do not think your most recent picture is your best, but that is due simply to poor posture and a bad camera angle (also, not loving the beard, but it is for a good cause). I know it can be hard not to compare ourselves with younger, fitter people...especially at the gym...but really, you are in great shape for a man of any age (of course I think of 40 as quite young, since I am five years your senior).
August 10, 2014 8:03 PM
that is easy to answer: because you aren't the "other guys" You are you. Looks good to me.
  49713959
August 10, 2014 8:37 PM
you are looking good! And I agree, this photo was not the best out of all of them ( I peeked). You definitely got some muscles and your hard work is obvious.
August 11, 2014 2:59 AM
This trip that we're on is a real learning experience, that is inevitably saturated with disappointment.

Effort over time is one part of it, however learning about chemical compositions of food and various minutia that overtly and covertly effect the results that we have is at least half of it.

Be patient, keep at it you'll be there one day.
Edited by Nojoke81 On August 11, 2014 3:01 AM
  67549726
August 11, 2014 3:20 AM
Think you are looking great. Keep up the hard work.
  54485409
August 11, 2014 7:20 AM
Thanks folks, and many apologies. This thread has spelled it out to me that mentally and physically I'm poles apart. I'm desperate to get a good body because I can't do anything about my face and I just want to have SOMETHING about me that could one day be considered attractive and therefore finally be able to be comfortable in my own skin instead of ashamed of it.
August 11, 2014 7:21 AM
QUOTE:

When you say "other guys" who are you talking about? Like ifbb pro bodybuilders, guys at your gym, people here on mfp?


The other guys on here with the ripped profile pics.
August 11, 2014 7:22 AM
I see absolutely nothing wrong with the way you look.
  54295704
August 11, 2014 7:33 AM
QUOTE:

Thanks folks, and many apologies. This thread has spelled it out to me that mentally and physically I'm poles apart. I'm desperate to get a good body because I can't do anything about my face and I just want to have SOMETHING about me that could one day be considered attractive and therefore finally be able to be comfortable in my own skin instead of ashamed of it.


Alright. I have peeped your pics. I have studied your face.

1) You have a pleasantly shaped oval face.

2) Your jawline is strong and enviable.

3) You have no double chins, jowls or turkey neck.

4) Your skin is clear.

5) You have no unibrow. You need no depilatories.

6) The size and shape of your nose is proportionate with the rest of your face.

7) Your ears are sleekly attached to your skull. They do not stick out.

8) Your teeth appear to be reasonably straight and reasonably white.

9) Your lips are A-OK. They are not cruelly thin. They are not Joliesque blubbery.

10) You have naturally fair hair and facial hair. You are not even grey.

11) Your bone structure is classic Brit/Euro. And should be a source of pride.

Come on. You are no dog. Stop being crazy. For Heaven's sake.

But, ah, lose the beard. It hides the very nice features listed above.
Edited by newmeadow On August 11, 2014 7:39 AM
August 11, 2014 7:39 AM
QUOTE:

Looking at your diary, you are most likely not in enough surplus, basic rule of thumb is a 500 calorie surplus, I seriously doubt your maintenance intake is 1800-1900 calories. I would also drop your protein to 0.8 to 1 gram per pound of lean body mass, 260 grams would sustain Jay Cutler, you would be more than fine at 200 grams, your fats are fine, the rest would be carbohydrates. You cannot grow without a surplus of calories, and trying to lean bulk at just above maintenance takes the knowledge of a mad scientist as you could very well over exert yourself and end up in a deficit.

Make sure you track your progression or total volume (weightxrepsxsets) and be sure to increase it over time, working to failure is not always the key as you will decrease the total volume by falling short on remaining sets, save working to failure for your last set or two of an exercise to keep your volume at its highest.

But you look like you are coming along just fine, keep up the good work.



THIS!! Couldn't sum it up better myself.
August 11, 2014 7:41 AM
QUOTE:

I feel the same, but a good friend gave me the following advice:

Its your body not theirs, you have no idea what they do each day, they might be spending 12 hours a day in the gym or been training for 5+ years.
Just be happy with what you have and what you are gaining.

A year ago, you would have looked at people with your current body shape and wondered why you can't look like that


Five years I know people in their 20s who have been training for over a decade.

I am not to sure if age has anything to do with not building muscle well. I'm sure it makes no differences.
  46314369
August 11, 2014 7:42 AM
You look good to me, face and body (I see the beard is being grown for a special reason). You have nothing to be ashamed of. Put simply, I think the problem lies within. You need to work on your self-esteem. Confidence (and I don't mean arrogance) is attractive. smile
  54176560

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