Samuraiko's profile

Samuraiko

40 years old
Female
Lynnwood, WA
"Thus Begins the Koverhaul"

About Me:

I'm a 22-year-old in a 39-year-old body. Since I'm apparently past the warranty phase on my body, I'm resigned to fixing it myself. I'm not quite ready for racing stripes, so I'm taking it a bit at a time.

I like to think that my body has a co-dependency relationship with fat. When I lose weight, I occasionally go through phases where the fat comes back, and I imagine that it's like an annoying ex-lover who doesn't understand that my body doesn't want to put up with its s*** anymore. But every now and again, my body goes, "Oh, okay, maybe one more try... no, f*** it" and then like four pounds come off at once.

And here is my theme song (to the tune of "I Will Survive", lyrics by me):

At first, I was afraid, I was petrified,
Kept thinking, I could never eat
unless the food was fried
And how I spent so many nights,
eating cookies by the pound,
Until I found, that my body shape was round

So to that fat, all over me
I know it's both our faults
you made my toes impossible to see
I should have skipped that chocolate cake
I should have taken yoga class
But now I've simply had enough of you
just riding on my a**

Go on now, go, get off of me
Just melt away now,
'coz I am losing weight, you see
You were the one
who shot my blood pressure sky high
Set my heart racing
until I thought that I would die

Oh no not that, to hell with fat,
Oh, I'll miss my late night bingeing fits,
but I can live with that
I've got a life to live, you see,
I've got some muscle still in me
So, goodbye fat, health's where it's at,
hey hey!

It took all the will I had not to eat it all
I had to learn
Domino's understands if I don't call
I may spend way too many nights
just craving everything I see
I want to feed, but I'll eat only what I need

So when you see me looking great
It's coz I'm strong enough
to not completely clear my plate
And when I feel like giving up
and thinking I just can't survive
I'll think of just how great I'll feel
when I'm 175

Go on now, go, get off of me
Just melt away now,
'coz I am losing weight, you see
You were the one
who shot my blood pressure sky high
Set my heart racing
until I thought that I would die

Oh no not that, to hell with fat,
Oh, I'll miss my late night bingeing fits,
but I can live with that
I've got a life to live, you see,
I've got some muscle still in me
So, goodbye fat, health's where it's at,
hey hey!

Why I want to get in shape

I'm off to a major convention in July 2014, and this overweight, out-of-breath, gods-my-back-and-feet-are-killing-me thing is so not cool for that. So it's out with the weight, in with the better health.

My Inspirations

  • ConBravo 2014
  • Looking like I'm younger than 40, even when I reach 40
  • Lots of great clothes from my thinner years waiting for me

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