Another Brownie Badge
Mom... oh mom. She really is great. She drives me nuts, and can embarrass me at times (I'm sure she'll comment on my spelling if she reads this... SORRY MOM!), but she really is the best woman I know. I have been told by many people that amongst other reasons, they just love her because she is absolutely honest when asked a question, and even times when not asked (or is that just my experience?).
I spent much of today with the lovely Bar. I went over to her house around 9 am to help her turf my step-dad's junk into the dumpster - no there is no vendeta I am aware of. He's just on vacation and has too much crap... so maybe she is a little evil - and ate a bit of breakfast before I got there. I needed more to eat to start my day off right, so I raided her fridge and had some chicken. About 2 and a half hours later, I made us some lunch. I quickly ran to the gym for an hour, came back and ate a few bites of pasta (litterally, maybe 3 bites of plain pasta she had preped for dinner), and finished off the 1/4 of a protein shake I had sitting in my fridge for a day. I ran some junk down to the Value Village for her, came home and made us some proscuitto with melon as a snack. While I was making said snack, mommy dearest was snoozing away in her bedroom. I woke her up and handed her the plate and said, "EAT UP, MA!"... she then said to me "DO YOU EVER STOP EATING?!?!?" I replied with a very confident "Nope" and continued to chow down.
Reflecting on that very short interaction, I realized, this is the first time I have ever not been ashamed of my eating when questioned about it. Growing up my mom always tried to help me and encourage me, but I never took it that way. I always thought she was coming down on me, which made me feel awful about myself. Today I felt nothing of that, and to be perfectly honest, it is kind of a weird feeling. I am proud of my eatng habits, and my choices now. I am proud to say I can snack and not hide it. I am proud to say I know what I'm doing. A lot of that comes from the support I find here on MFP; not necessarily asking for support, but when I read about what others are doing, and how confident they are, and how great they are eating. I feel like I'm doing it right, and sticking to it for the first time in my life.
So agian, thanks to all you MFP folks who keep trucking along and inspiring me, and thanks to my Momma for being you. I finally have a little confidence, and a little pride. Yay for me :)