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Struggling But Keeping Positive

I'm feeling quite positive after quitting here and returning, trying to sneak in the back door un-noticed , but I've been struggling and was up 20lbs. I'm at the heaviest I've been. I'm up 2 jeans sizes and my bras don't fit, wearing baggy tops. That's really not where i want to be at, and I'm not feeling happy or healthy at all. The doc is putting it down to a change of the pill i'm on the last 5 months as you can't take a combined pill in your 40's due to increased risk of blood clots.  The pill is a factor in the weight gain but i must also take responsibility for the constant eating and the junk food that i choose to eat instead of making healthier choices. People that see me don't think of me as over weight but that's cos i have a small face, it distributes mostly on my boobs, hips, thighs and bum and i'm only 5ft 1 (157cm) and that's not good, I feel heavy, i feel tired, lethargic, out of breath when i walk. Why do i feel positive? Well i know now that i'm at my heaviest weight at 146.5 lbs somewhere, and i know that pretending its not an issue is not going to help me. I accept that this has happened and now is the time to take action before it gets worse. Lately i made half hearted attempts to come back. But now I am back. And willing to make this a proper decent attempt to do this not to be thin but at least , to be healthy. (some weight loss very welcome though lol) No more excuses. It stops and starts today. Weird to have both in the one sentence, but i owe it to myself to be the best healthiest me i can be, going forward into my 40's. Thanks for reading , I feel better writing about it here because i know i'm not alone here. I know there is plenty like me here that feel the same way,and I/we could all really use the support. x

54 votes + -


Brindal87 wrote 4 months ago:
You are not alone! Focus on eating healthy, and the weight loss will follow.

Best to you,

frank2x2 wrote 4 months ago:
I am there with you Margeh. I really have been struggling this year, 3 pounds from my highest right now. I am just trying to focus on making healthy choices one day, one meal, at a time.

You got this! ((margeh))
margeh75 wrote 4 months ago:
Thanks, i'm just praying for better willpower this time but it's really difficult!
deehartcc wrote 3 months ago:
I get it! Glad to see you back and with a vengeance! Looking forward to your success.
irishding wrote 3 months ago:
Well done. They say, accepting your current reality is a very positive and necessary first step. I have been trying to manage my weight, as they say forever, I was on here a few years ago, and now I'm back.. with a renewed effort and maybe a better understanding of why my weight stays 14 pounds more than it should be. I find myself saying ..Sure I don't eat that much!!, I eat healthy (and I do for the most part) but my body is very unforgiving, and I needs to stick to a solid routine (of daily net calories), without making my life a complete misery. I set a goal of 1 pound loss per week (and I recommed that you do this too) and after 6 weeks I'm am just slightly above this target. (Though I seem to have gained a pound over last week which was a wee bit disappointing, I guess these things just happen) It's fairly simple but we need to understand for every 1 pound we need to either reduce our calorie intake or increase our burn by approx. 3,000 calories. Yes weight loss is the goals for most, to not feel bloated and being crushed by clothing waistband, desperately not wanting to go up another size. But it's not easy, and we do need support or at least be disciplined. I live alone so I don't have that, but find using MFP a great help. It is not easy to be diligent about recording ever morsel that passes our lips, but that is an absolute must. t is the only way we can honestly establish what is really a happening, and why our weight is changing either up or down. So I wish you luck and want to let you know you are not alone in this. The main benefit is improved health and self-esteem. I am determined to stick with this progam. Time will tell. :)
grim1 wrote 3 months ago:
I also, had been struggling then I read an article.
Yes, Orbera Balloon. Can't believe that I am down 17 lbs. In 27 days.Today my weight is 167.9 lbs

The best decision I had made in my life as weight management is concern. I had none of the side effect of nausea, vomiting nor stomach cramping at all. Followed the doctor's instruction. Dr. Batash I give all the credit to making this procedure so smooth, and I can't forget the patient (me) who has a memory problem.
Anniepi66 wrote 3 months ago:
Sure needed to read this today. I just posted on my page how badly I'm struggling. But unlike you, I'm having a hard time with "positive"! Good to know I'm not alone. Going to read your blog again after I write this. This weight struggle has got to stop!!
The_Movie_Chair wrote 3 months ago:
Don't make it an attempt, just do it. Language is a powerful tool. When we use words like "trying" or "attempt" it leaves the back door open for us to not succeed.

Getting healthier and losing weight, it is a struggle, it blows my mind on a daily base.

In the end, I think it doesn't matter how much we need to lose to be healthier, we will have to find a way to stick to it either way.
ApostleCreed wrote 3 months ago:
I read something recently that really sliced through all the grief since January 20th that had resulted in bad eating. It really put me back on the right and true track for understanding why this comfort-eating was happening to me. Maybe it will inspire you to get back on your own healthy road! Here it is:

"Trust the body, not the mind; the body loves itself."
JeromeBarry1 wrote 3 months ago:
Just tell the truth to your food diary. Tell the truth to your exercise diary.
yogih wrote 3 months ago:
thanks for sharing, it is a struggle, but keep going, try new things, make it interesting, keep connected and find people who keep you motivated... we all have slips, its how you recover from them... xx
margeh75 wrote 3 months ago:
Thanks everyone so much for the support, i really need it now as i'm at the heaviest i've ever been. Its tough. One day i'm a lb down then i'm lb up another day. Seems like the fat don't want to budge lol but i'm not giving up!
vettelady2001 wrote 3 months ago:
I feel the same way. I struggle and try to remain positive but it is hard to do.
thehadster wrote 3 months ago:
In the same boat. Keep going!
loribear53 wrote 3 months ago:
You are not alone! Those individual decisions to choose healthfully each meal, each snack, will add up over time and you'll start to see the difference. That had helped me, that and not trying too lose too much each week. A one pound lose each week is sustainable. I understand the hormone situation. I'm 54 and taking Tamoxifen because I've had breast cancer and don't want it to return. Stay positive and keep making those individual healthy choices!
danigirl1011 wrote 3 months ago:
I was very successful on here 5 years ago....then got married, fat and happy. Gained 70 pounds! I am newly returning as well and we are going to do this! You will get back to where you want to be. Just try and be as consistent as you can. You got this! :)
shanicejardine11 wrote 3 months ago:
In the same boat and its been 62 days of tracking and making better decisions but I've lost absolutely nothing and its hard to stay positive.
margeh75 wrote 3 months ago:
I understand everyone, sometimes its so difficult to keep positive, i mean i put back on the pound i lost the other day. I'm doing 10,000 steps a day and all and i'm fighting with a lbs here and a lb there, but i won't give up. And i do feel better than i'm not alone in my situation. I just want to feel better in myself as well but i loathe what i see in the mirror. I need to make healthier choices. I haven't always done that the past few weeks, even the last few days but tomorrow i definitely will as i'm feeling mighty tired lately. thanks for the support! Feel free to add me :)
DMJ0729 wrote 3 months ago:
Glad you are back! I totally get where you are coming from. I'm only 5'2" and I've been as much as 151. I'm also in my 40's and I lose and feel great and gain it back and get disgusted with myself. But that negative self talk gets me nowhere so I vow to pull my (slightly tighter) pants up and get back in the game. I've only been back a little over a week but can already feel myself feeling more positive and looking toward making better and better decisions (and will NOT beat myself up for an occasional slip up, we are all only human).
Also, I notice that I stay more positive when I only weigh once a week. If I do it every day, I tend to get overly obsessive and discouraged. Just what works for me. :)
a1mehta wrote 3 months ago:
It takes a lot of courage to be honest with yourself. Having done that, you have already won half the battle. Now, I would take one day at a time. One day of healthy choices. One day of exercise. Keep stacking those daily wins and before you know you will be looking at the finishing line!! Good Luck!
caseyandkidsnc wrote 3 months ago:
I have to take it one meal at a time.
laisfcaetano wrote 3 months ago:
Just a little tip that worked very well for me: do not weigh yourself everyday. Our minds want to sabotage us, so when we can't see a result that pleases us, we think that there's no point in continuing because it isn't working anyway. We all know that the key to dieting is consistency, which is the hardest part. So to make it a little easier and to not discourage yourself, have a weigh-in every two weeks or every month, it's enough time for you to have dropped some weight and feel better about what you're doing rather than obssesing about the daily weight fluctuations.
sahkim wrote 3 months ago:
I know where you're coming from. Decided to come back here to start getting back on track. We've just taken the first step to our better selves!

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