Why Men Lose Weight More Easily than Women, Really
I have seen a lot folks say that men lose weight more quickly than woman. That's not all they do more quickly; it is the micro-wave vs crockpot analogy.
As usual, I have few thoughts that are shrouded in stupidity, and flavored with a dash of truth.
- Clothes: Men don't by clothes in sizes. If man goes from a size 12 to an 8, it is because he cut off his foot in a logging accident.
- Gastric Bypass (Flagellation): Men just fart more, sometimes significantly reducing their body mass and destroying meaningful conversation.
- Muscles Mass: Men have a few more places to put muscles. For example, the mouth. (Please refer to the anatomy chart below for additional locations).
- Unplanned Trips: These generally come in the form of bread and milk. However; they can be for diapers, baby formula - and when the woman are away, beer. Each trip is worth about 100 calories.
- 12 or 16 oz. Curls: This is a body building technique that most woman are unwilling to undertake because it requires the lack of small children, morals and brain power to accomplish. It comes in many forms, but most MFP-ers would call it Bud or Miller Lite. I think it is in the cardio search.
- Yelling: They yell at the TV more than woman. Politics, sports, and the Hunting Channel give you more to yell about than the Ellen, Lifetime and Disney. This is also in the cardio search.
- Scotch: It's a replacement for protein shakes. When used in excess, it not only keeps the male from eating, but in severe cases performing all but the most basic bodily functions including reverse peristalsis which counts as -10 calories consumed.
- Faster Metabolism: It is true, most men burn calories more quickly than woman, particularly around the time the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue is published.
- Relating to Food: In general woman tend to be more emotional about food, where the majority of men are not willing to admit to having any emotions.
- Sex: When men think of romance, they are not thinking about food, going out to dinner etc. This is a huge calorie saver.
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