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It takes a Village

It's not the first time I am trying to lose weight, but it is the first time I am doing it successfully so far. All the other times I had a plan, this time I don't have a clue.

There is not a diet out there that I haven't I tried. It started about 25 years ago with a diet that required us to eat fruits just like the stars in Hollywood. Of course, I tried it, and, of course, I failed. Back then it wasn't so dramatic; I had about 20 pounds to lose.

A few years later I ate cabbage soup until it came out of my ears.  Eat fewer carbs and more protein. Eat salads and fruits only in the morning. Don't eat after 4 pm. No sugar and fat-free and from there it went straight to a lifestyle that asked me to eat fatty food but took my daily bread away. 

Eat carbs only and wait at least three hours before you eat only protein. (You won't believe how long three hours can be.)

Then, of course, I too fell for the commercials and had food sent to my home. It looked (and tasted) like cardboard and left me hungry. Goodness, what is wrong with celebrities these days. If you make millions, for Heaven's sake hire a chef and let him cook and serve you delicious meals. It's not that complicated.

I went to meetings where calories became points, and I liked that for about two weeks. When I knew how to drink and snack my points away, that's when I left. I found a miracle juice that promised a 10-pound weight loss in three days and pills, powders, and shakes that promised similar results.

It was torture, and I admire everybody that can stick to any of these diet suggestions. Maybe it's just me, but it never worked for me. You tell me I can't have something and it leaves me wanting more of it. Every diet I tried left me wanting what I couldn't have. I lost weight, sometimes even 10 - 15 pounds and I always found it again -and then some. 

This time it's different. I can have it all. We are trying new foods and new recipes, and we both enjoy it. My husband, who doesn't have to lose weight, can eat all he wants and I limit myself to a healthy portion. I am never hungry.

I waste some of my calories on alcohol during the weekend, and a dirty Martini never tasted better. The 230 calories are the highlight of my weekend after a 50 hr. week. I counted gummy bears like a little kid; made sure I had all of the 30 bears I was allowed to have, and I enjoyed each one of them.

We buy vegetables we have never seen before and try food combinations that we didn't think were possible. Who knew a black bean burger could be that good? Who knew an artichoke and a lemon sauce would make me smile? It almost feels like I am retraining my taste butts. 

My husband jokes and calls our new lifestyle our luxury diet and perhaps he has a point. Our grocery bill went up since I started here at MFP; fresh and healthy food is more expensive- but on the other hand, our take-out bill shrunk to almost $0; it evens it out. 

I don't have a plan, and I am succeeding. The pounds are coming off, sometimes fast and sometimes slow.

Why do I succeed? Because I am here and I am with people just like me. We all fight together, and while we have different backgrounds, we all have the same goal. We want to be healthier, more active and lose weight.

The accountability here at MFP and the sharing part with a group of people, who start to feel like real friends, is the key for me. We are a small community inside a big community and we interact on a daily base. The good and the bad get shared merciless -we laugh and we shout, and we all learn from it.

Perhaps it's true, it does take a village. 

44 Pounds lost - 96 lbs to go!

156 votes + -

38 comments:

kristikitter wrote 2 months ago:
How exciting is that to see that you have fewer than 100lbs to lose?! That's just nine more instances of 10lbs... plus change! Eee I'm excited FOR you! And I love your blog entries, I read them and I feel coached & encouraged.
Detritus_1965 wrote 2 months ago:
Marvelous as always.

Proud to be part of the village
SilverSheWolf55 wrote 2 months ago:
As usual, my friend, I love this post. YES, you are right, it does take a village. I, too, have fought the same battles as you. The "low carb diet" worked well for me, however, like you, the weight found me again, (and then some). I cannot stick to a "low carb" way of living. I LOVE your way....portion control and healthy eating. GOOD FOR YOU, MY SWEET FRIEND! YOU CAN DO THIS!! We all get by with a little help from our friend. :-)
Ahanaz wrote 2 months ago:
Such an inspiring post! I'm so happy you found a way that works for you!

I need to get back to it. This was just what I needed to get more motivation. Thank you!
Krizzle4Rizzle wrote 2 months ago:
I really, really love your blog posts.
vmyn63 wrote 2 months ago:
Your blog is FABULOUS! I can so relate to all of your past struggles.
musicsax wrote 2 months ago:
Yes, we have all tried the fad diets, but for me like you it has taken a healthy eating and lifestyle including lots of walking and some yoga for me to have finally succeeded in getting to the healthy weight I am now and it's helping me now to maintain. So pleased you are finding and enjoying new ways of eating healthier food, there is nearly always an alternative way. My husband also does not need to lose weight of watch what he says, but he has/does enjoy what I eat but he has bigger portions. We are lucky to have such supportive other halves.
Keep at it my friend you are doing brilliantly, I am here for you with support and really enjoy your blog.
FriendsForFamily wrote 2 months ago:
It's amazing that your story is all of our stories, and yet with all the technology out there we are all still having this same problem.

Who benefits? Pharma, doctors, hospitals, drugs, clothing, groceries, restaurants. Why would any of them want us to change our habits? Money!!! The bigger the body the bigger the money.

At least here we are doing our best to take control and be responsible for ourselves. To learn new habits, shape new lives, and pass it onto others coming behind us who have fallen into the same bad habits that all of us had. To teach them through example that there is a way out of the darkness that being overweight shadow's upon them. To take back control from all the money grabber's.

I'm not blaming them on my being fat because it truly is and always has been about choice, some about genetics and I'm sure for most of us about stress and the trials bestowed upon us starting at very young ages that no one should have to go through. Our choices created bad habit's and the food industry made it easy for us.

My choice, my friends, is to stay right here with all of you and fight back, take control, and overcome, even if it takes the rest of my life to do so.




bampitt wrote 2 months ago:
It's funny that you said that it's like you were retraining your taste buds. That's exactly how I felt, too, when I started. I go to Cookinglight.com and Skinnytaste for most of my recipes and I've never been happier. I also found that I did my grocery shopping differently. I stuck to my shopping list and found that I shop the perimeter of the store - always! I never buy prepackaged food anymore!
izzybelle2013 wrote 2 months ago:
You are always on point with your blogs. I really enjoy reading them. And I am very proud of your point of view and how you have changed. Keep up the good work, and continue losing.
brookielaw wrote 2 months ago:
Your blogs are fabulous! I'm glad you have figured out what WORKS for you! :) Keep up the great work!
debk0718 wrote 2 months ago:
Well written Bridget!! Your posts are always so truthful and I'm certain we're all saying, "yes, yes!" I'd not previously gotten to much into the posts previously but so thankful and grateful to know that I now do have a support group. Thank you for your blogs, friendship and inspiration.
SiegfriedXXL wrote 2 months ago:
I just adore your writing style. You draw me in and everything you write is relatable.

I too have tried every diet known to man, woman, and microbe. From food combining with Marilu Henner to our dear matron, Jenny Craig, and nothing has worked. Something is, finally, and you're right. It's having the pizza when I want it, having the cream puff when I want it. Not every day, but definitely no denial.

I'm so glad to have wandered into this particular village. The food is good, the villagers are amazing, and the buildings are sturdy.

P.S. - I love me a dry martini of a weekend.
rdmyown wrote 2 months ago:
Your blogs are so inspiring!
Hoppymom wrote 2 months ago:
Um so glad to hear that you are enjoying your food and your success and that your husband is supportive. You have to eat so in a way that you can sustain and it sounds like you've found the answer. I can't wait to hear how your adventure continues.
Gardengal1222 wrote 2 months ago:
You never cease to inspire me with your blogs. You are the kind of friend I need to keep me motivated and on point when the going gets tough. You always make me realize that I am not in this alone and we are all going through this together. Yes, it is a struggle for all of us no matter how much we need to lose. You sure make me know that I can do this....we all can do this!!
thelifeilove1 wrote 2 months ago:
Great thoughts. I have traveled a very similar path. This one works. One of my favorites of summer are fresh berries with heavy cream for a dessert. Guess what. I can have it; I just limit my cream to 2 T with a 1/2 cup of berries. Tonight they were raspberries. How can this possibly be a weight loss option. Not only must we retrain taste buds, we must retrain our minds on portion sizes while selecting satisfying foods which don't leave us hungry. Great being here with you.
thelifeilove1 wrote 2 months ago:
Oh, I did want to say I really wish the recipes we put on here could be easily shared. Many of your foods sound so delicious. If you enter yours like I do so I know the nutritional values, it would be great to be able to pull them up. Many someday they'll do that.
ElisaJtsu wrote 2 months ago:
Thank you once more for sharing. I love reading your blogs; they always 'hit home'. You have no idea how much you motivate me!Thank you.
kdavid1987 wrote 2 months ago:
Love reading this. Please enjoy all your adventures in healthy and delicious eating! So glad you are having successes :)
bmeadows380 wrote 2 months ago:
From one Bridget to another (I don't run into too many Bridgets lol)

I'm in the same boat with twice the weight to lose. I didn't try the fad diets - I knew right off that low carb wasn't going to work for me. People want to lay blame that its all in laziness and gluttony, but those who've never been obese have no idea how bad the mental war is, and I think its the mental front where the vast majority of us lose, from those who don't care and don't want to control what they eat to those of us who do care but struggle with will power.

And you hit the nail on the head about the grocery bill going up: I see all these people who claim its cheaper to eat healthier, and I'd like to know where they are shopping! My grocery bill has went much higher because produce is more expensive, and the whole grains and other healthy foods are more expensive. But I do save by not going out to eat so much any more. It doesn't quite even out because I was never a huge take out person anyway, but it helps!

Moderation and compromise, I'm learning, are the key for me. don't deprive myself of something, but learn to have a smaller portion, or look for a healthier version. If I find myself craving french fries, I'll get a kid's meal size bag.

But more than anything, its the support here in my 100 lbs + group that helps me keep going, even when the going gets tough. I don't have a lot of support in the weight loss fight from family, as they don't care to eat what I eat or portion control, and I have other relatives who are constantly judging and critical of weight, so finding friends here that understand, that are supportive, that encourage me when I slip up and cheer me on when I succeed - that means the world to me!
renelarry00 wrote 2 months ago:
I love reading all the blogs because I relate and don't feel judged. I have like most of you been on the whirlwind a long time and have tried everything, MFP gives me the encouragement to know that there isn't anything I can't have as long as I fit it in.I would like to encourage each of you on your journey, we are in this together. Blessings !!!
ProfessorPupil wrote 2 months ago:
I love your posts! You're so inspiring. :)
dar0rn wrote 2 months ago:
Congratulations! You are a true inspiration!! Maybe there is hope for me.
carmy7850 wrote 2 months ago:
You are awesome Bridget and so much you write about hits home with most of us.Thank You for being you my friend!
daneejela wrote 2 months ago:
You are totally right! I enjoy your writing style so much! I can't express myself that good in English, but sometimes I feel like you do it for me, that's how much I can relate! :) Please, keep writing!
raleighgirl09 wrote 2 months ago:
Congrats on hitting your groove! I have come to similar conclusions and am ok with it being slow sometimes, faster when I am in the mood to be more restrictive but always doing it. => YAY for a healthier YOU!
tinkerbellang83 wrote 2 months ago:
Your posts are very inspirational! I love your writing style it's very similar to my own.
demuro wrote 2 months ago:
Wow! You are doing great! I too have been "dieting" for the past 30 odd years... and every time I end up gaining it all back and then some. Life changes...I like how you are doing it this time.
Fionawilby wrote 2 months ago:
This is wonderful. Thank you for sharing.
swat1948 wrote 2 months ago:
I'm on vacation right now and while that is no excuse to eat like a pig, I'm not counting calories but not going hog wild either. Still getting in exercise and as a matter of fact, shared with an MFP pal that the more you move, the more you want to move. When I get back home I will need my village. My clothing is becoming snug and that's not a good thing. Congrats to you. You should be proud!
tcostantini1 wrote 1 month ago:
This was absolutely fantastic. I'm actually so happy and I hope you keep on keeping on. I believe in you! :)
Amandakaye711 wrote 1 month ago:
So wonderful!!! I am right there with you, sister. This is my first time being any kind of successful with my weight loss. 40 lbs down- 65 to go. We got this!!!
MochiLuv wrote 1 month ago:
It's so true isn't it? Tell me what I can't have and I just want more of it. We are such rebels! Thanks for a great post....it really helped with my frame of mind today :-)
LindaCan2 wrote 1 month ago:
Don't think of it as a "diet" which is something you do for a period of time and when you reach your weight goal, you go off your "diet" and return to your previous eating habits. Think of it as a "lifestyle" and when you reach your goal, you will continue tracking your food and exercise. It's like keeping a check register for your bank account. You don't start and stop; you keep tracking your money coming in and going out. Maybe this will help you.
snowintx wrote 1 month ago:
"Why do I succeed? Because I am here and I am with people just like me. We all fight together, and while we have different backgrounds, we all have the same goal. We want to be healthier, more active and lose weight." Yes, I agree with we are here on MFP for the same reasons. "WE ALL FIGHT TOGETHER"
priscillamcdaniel35 wrote 3 weeks ago:
then can I be apart of the village I do not have a lot of wieght to loose I am the voice for a active lifestyle, a healthy life, and happy living I am changing after being sick for 4 years and now a stay at home homey and need a village I need help. I fight depression and I am doing well I have started to exercise daily, log my food, and come here and now I am a tribe member lost in this world of I can do it but I need help. So if you want will you please add me to your friends list thank you!
measem1 wrote 3 weeks ago:
Love this and sounds like me. The best weight loss I saw was I lost about 20 lbs a couple years ago but had a car accident that messed me up. Just getting back into it and scared to see my weight. I know I've gained something just not sure what. Thanks for inspiring me. I'm slowly adding cooking back to my regular routine. Thanks for the inspiration and may I add you to my friend list I need some added motivation.

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